Transcript of You Are It

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This transcript involves dialogue with Double agent, Reldo, Duke Horacio, Uri, Woman (You Are It), and the player.

Mysterious clue scroll[edit | edit source]

McGrubors Wood[edit | edit source]

Chopping the tree for the first time[edit | edit source]

  • You find a mysterious clue scroll attached to the tree.
  • The double agent appears and begins to threaten you.
  • Double agent: Player. Your name has appeared on my list. A very exclusive list it is, too. A list of one. I have a terrible time keeping it updated. As soon as I add someone to it, they die soon after. I can't abide the crossings out. So much mess. But there you are. Top of the list of one.
  • The double agent walks closer and points at you.
  • Double agent: You. Are. It.
  • The double agent teleports away and a menacing scream makes you cover your ears.

Trying to chop down the tree afterwards[edit | edit source]

Without having lost the mysterious clue scroll[edit | edit source]
  • The tree seems strangely resistant to hatchets.
Having lost the mysterious clue scroll[edit | edit source]
  • You find a mysterious clue scroll attached to the tree.

Reldo[edit | edit source]

Talking to him with the first stage of the clue scroll in your inventory[edit | edit source]

  • Reldo: Oh no...not you. Why did it have to be you? You're dead. Or you are as good as dead.
  • Player: What are you talking about?
  • Reldo: That clue scroll, the one in your backpack. I have seen it countless times before. Each time, an adventurer brings it so me, and each time they die. Not here in the library, but sometime after. And I have this very same conversation with them; I tell them about the scroll and they do of two things... They either complete the clue scroll and go missing. Or they ignore the clue scroll, and die. I get a coroner's report, requesting that I remove their names from the records. Player, I am so sorry. I don't know why I have been chosen to play such a pivotal role in this curse. None of my research has revealed anything of use. All I know is that you need to hand me that clue scroll so I can sign it.
  • You hand the clue to Reldo who quickly adds an extravagant signature to the paper. As he finishes, you notice his signature and the text disappear as new words form on the paper.
  • Reldo: There you go. The clue has moved on to its second stage. Best wishes, Player. I hope to see you again, for your sake.

Talking to him with the second stage of the clue scroll in your inventory[edit | edit source]

  • Reldo: What a relief to see you alive still! I hope the burden of that clue isn't getting you down; if anyone can solve the mystery of this, I hope it is you.
  • (Continues with Reldo's normal dialogue options.)

Lumbridge Castle[edit | edit source]

Performing the "cry" emote[edit | edit source]

  • A spark of energy is released from the clue scroll as you begin to cry.

After performing the required emotes[edit | edit source]

  • Duke Horacio: Are you okay, young [lady/man]?
  • Screen fades out and fades in again, you are now surrounded by Ripper Demons and the double agent who is also a Ripper Demon.
  • Double agent: Oh dear... I hope you don't feel naked without your armour right now. No need to worry: I won't be killing you quite yet. Can I ask a favour? After I leave, you will see things. I ask that you ignore them. They are trifles. Put them aside and give up on your quest. Enjoy the time you have remaining. Don't waste your few hours on a clue scroll. You. Are. It.
  • The Ripper Demons lash at you and the screen fades out and fades in again.
  • Flashback: Uri is talking to Duke Horacio.
  • Uri: Horacio. I truly am sorry for your loss.
  • Duke Horacio: Thank you, undertaker. I have something for you... for her grave. This casket holds everything she loved. I want her to be buried with it. Is that possible?
  • Uri: Yes, your Honour. She can be buried with it.
  • Duke Horacio: Thank you. Thank you for everything.
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • You notice something different about the clue in your backpack.

Lumbridge graveyard[edit | edit source]

  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • Vision: Uri is standing on the grave of the Duchess.
  • Uri: Hello Duchess!
  • Uri digs up a treasure casket.
  • Uri: Now, what treasures do you hide?
  • Uri searches through the casket.
  • Uri: Letters, worthless.
  • He continues to search through it.
  • Uri: Rags.
  • He continues to search through it.
  • Uri: Wait - obsidian jewellery! Yes. That will do. That will do very well indeed!
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • The double agent appears next to you.
  • Double agent: You know what they say about graverobbing? If you're in a hole, you may as well make money from it. Uri was in debt. So, he added graverobbing to his resume. Undertaking and graverobbing. They go hand in muddy hand. But that's not why I am here, is it? I am here to menace, to threaten. To tell you to stop following this rotten clue scroll. You will die either way, so stop following it. Relax, let the death happen. Enjoy your demise!
  • The double agent points at the player.
  • Double agent: You. Are. It.
  • The double agent teleports away and a menacing scream makes you cover your ears.
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • You find a casket!
  • You notice something different about the clue in your backpack.

Attempting to open the casket[edit | edit source]

  • The casket is locked shut.

Returning to Horacio with the locked casket[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Hello. I found this casket in the graveyard. I believe it once belonged to someone close to you.
  • Duke Horacio: Greetings. You're right, I had a chest like that one once. I mean, it was slightly smaller, but the wood, the finish and the pattern were near identical.
  • Player: I thought this WAS yours.
  • Duke Horacio: It's similar, I will give you that! But no, this is a different size than the one I had. It certainly brings back good memories though. Thank you for showing it to me. Is there something else I can help you with?
  • (Continues with standard dialogue options.)

Rimmington house portal[edit | edit source]

  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • Vision: Uri is talking to someone in his house.
  • Uri: We are closed.
  • Woman: I'm sorry it's late. I heard you were the person to come to. I need to bury someone.
  • Uri: That's why most people come here.
  • Woman: But I need to do it... discretely. My husband was not a poor man. And he was not well loved. Many would want to know his resting place. I fear that they would steal from his grave. Perhaps even desecrate it.
  • Uri walks up to the woman.
  • Uri: You have come to the right place. I assume you want a more... ornate burial? Icthlarin and Amascut look favourably on those who come to the Noumenon with gold.
  • Woman: Yes, yes. He said as much in his will.
  • Uri: Good. Can I take his name?
  • Woman: I don't think that we should discuss that right now.
  • Uri: Very well. We can talk over the smaller details later.
  • Woman: Thank you for your time.
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • You notice something different about the clue in your backpack.

Draynor Manor[edit | edit source]

Searching the bookcase[edit | edit source]

  • You find a key behind a book called The Blind Forest!

Using the key on the casket[edit | edit source]

  • You open the casket and find an old necklace inside!
  • You notice something different about the clue in your backpack.

Digging the Duchess's grave after having lost the old necklace[edit | edit source]

  • You find a necklace!

Charos's crypt[edit | edit source]

Unearthing the crypt[edit | edit source]

Digging at the correct spot in the wood[edit | edit source]

  • You feel the ground below you crumble as you dig.

Inspecting the hole without a rope in your inventory[edit | edit source]

  • Peering into the hole, you can make out a chamber below. It looks like you will need something to get down there.

Inspecting the hole with a rope in your inventory[edit | edit source]

  • You secure the rope in place.

Unveiling the mystery[edit | edit source]

Investigating the mantle[edit | edit source]

  • The mantle holds a collection of jade statues. They are covered in a layer of dust that indicates no one has touched them in a long time.

Investigating the coffin[edit | edit source]

  • As you search around the coffin you find an old journal. Before you can read it, another vision begins to form...
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • Vision: Uri is standing next to the coffin.
  • Uri: I always admired you, Charos. The things you did with magic boxes, trinkets, jewellery - I tried to match the detail and craftmanship in my caskets. I hope it is some consolation that you are being robbed by someone with the deepest respect for you.
  • Uri walks up to the mantle.
  • Uri: If I remember my studies well enough, I should be taking this one... your masterpiece.
  • The screen fades to white.
  • The memory is disrupted, making it impossible to see which jade statue Uri takes.
  • The screen fades in again.
  • Uri returned to the coffin.
  • Uri: Let's see if the tales are true. As many wishes as I want... I want to have more wealth than I could ever possibly spend.
  • The cavern shakes.
  • Uri: I want the wealth to be hidden from sight. It's mine.
  • The cavern shakes.
  • Uri: No one else can have this wishbringer. If anyone claims the wishbringer, they die.
  • The cavern shakes.
  • A voice echoes in the room.
  • YOU HAVE USED YOUR THREE WISHES.
  • Uri: THREE wishes? Wait, I thought there were...
  • ALL THAT YOU HAVE ASKED FOR, SHALL BE.
  • Uri is dragged into the ground by vines.
  • Screen fades out and fades in again.
  • The double agent appears next to you.
  • Double agent: Charos was always the trickster. Everything he gave came with a price.
  • Select an option
    • What happened to Uri?
      • Double agent: When Uri gained the treasure he desired, he was cursed to become the one who guarded it. He gained a treasure he could never have. Uri became me. But our late Mr. Charos obviously thought that wasn't enough of a game. He thought it would be hilarious if he left a crumb of Uri behind. And that crumb has been doing every pathetic little thing to revert the wishes. Leading adventurers to his treasures, as if selflessness would be the key to winning back his soul! As if it were that easy! For the most part, I've let Uri toil away. But he has managed to become an irritant. Uri has also been guiding others to this tomb, to find and destroy the wishbringer. That I cannot abide.
      • (Shows previous options)
    • What is the purpose of the cursed clue scroll?
      • Double agent: As you've probably guessed, I have misled you. The clue scroll is not EXACTLY cursed. It was written by Uri, leading people here. I've just added a bit of spice to proceedings. Made it seem cursed: threatening people as they do it, malingering, that sort of thing. Oh, and eating anyone who dares to take a jade figurine.
      • Player: Why haven't you just killed me before I got here?
      • Double agent: Oh no, I can't kill you. Not yet, anyway. I can only kill you if you claim the wishbringer. As per the rules of Uri's final wish.
      • (Shows previous options)
    • What happens next?
      • Double agent: Now, let me list what you probably SHOULDN'T do. You shouldn't claim the right wishbringer. I would have to kill you. You shouldn't claim the wrong wishbringer either. I would have to kill you. And don't think about trying to run away to get help. Charos put in a failsafe. If you try you'll find yourself strangely unable to speak about this business. Otherwise, you would just tell everyone about his resting place, right? I suppose you COULD destroy the correct wishbringer... But there are so many to choose from! What a task that would be. What a shame it would be if you got it wrong. I'll be over here, sharpening the teeth.
      • (Shows previous options)
    • I'm going to look around.
      • Double agent: Don't take too long.

Lifting the curse[edit | edit source]

Investigating the coffin[edit | edit source]

Without having lost Drakan's Journal[edit | edit source]
  • The lid is too heavy to shift. There is nothing more of interest to find.
Having lost Drakan's Journal[edit | edit source]
  • As you search around the coffin you find an old journal.

Investigating the mantle[edit | edit source]

  • The mantle holds a collection of jade statues. They are covered in a layer of dust that indicates no one has touched them in a long time.
  • Player: The double agent said I needed to destroy the correct wishbringer. I should choose wisely, as the wrong one will result in my death.
  • Select an option
  • Which statue would you like to destroy?
    • The Demon
      • (Continues below)
    • The Chicken
      • (Continues below)
    • The Aviansie
      • (Continues below)
    • The Dragon
      • (Continues below)
    • The Cow
      • (Continues below)
    • The Stone
      • (Continues below)
    • The Cabbage
      • (Continues below)
    • The Zogre
      • (Continues below)
    • The King
      • (Continues below)
    • The Queen
      • (Continues below)
  • Double agent: Are you sure you want to destroy that statue? I have to admit I'll miss your tenacious spirit if I have to kill you.
  • Destroy the statue?
    • Yes.
      • (If an incorrect statue was chosen:)
        • Double agent: You thought that was the real one?
        • Player dies, is placed outside of the tomb.
      • (If the correct statue was chosen:)
        • You take the statue from the mantle and smash it onto the floor, destroying it on the process.
        • You find a puzzle casket within the statue.
        • Screen fades out and fades in again.
        • The double agent is lifted into the air and surrounded by strange black smoke.
        • Double agent: What have you done, Player? Oh, who am I kidding? This is all wonderful weight off my shoulders. Godspeed, Player.
        • The double agent disappears, and Uri appears in his place.
        • Uri: You did it? You did it! Oh my goodness, I am whole again.
        • Screen fades out and fades in again.
    • No.

Inspecting the mantle after destroying the wishbringer[edit | edit source]

  • The mantle holds a collection of jade statues and a broken mess.
  • (If the puzzle casket has been lost:)
    • You find an unsolved puzzle casket on the mantle.

Talking to Uri after the curse is lifted[edit | edit source]

  • Uri: I never dreamed this moment would come. Never. I thought I was going to be a wisp until the end of days. Thank you, Player. Now, it's time to put Uri's Great Plan in place. I've had enough time - lord, more than enough time - to think on it. Point number one: my treasures are yours, the world's, whoever wants them. I wouldn't touch them with an iron javelin. Who knows what trigger Charos has placed on them! I'll even help you find them if I can. Point number two: that old necklace you discovered - it belonged to Charos. I'd like your help with that, if you are willing. There's too many unanswered questions here, and I believe the necklace it the key. What happened to Charos? Why did he create a wishbringer in the first place? Why was he so eager to stop people raiding his tomb? Bring me the necklace - his necklace. I believe that, with the jade shards scattered around the world, I can make it capable of finding out more about him. But, in the meantime, I will shower you with rewards. You deserve it, and I will be damned - literally - if I kept them.
  • Congratulations, quest complete!

Post quest dialogue[edit | edit source]

Duke Horacio[edit | edit source]

  • Duke Horacio: Greetings. Welcome to my castle.
  • Choose an option:
    • I seek a shield that will protect me from dragonbreath.
      • (Non-quest dialogue.)
    • Have you any quests for me?
      • (Non-quest dialogue.)
    • Where can I find money?
      • (Non-quest dialogue.)
    • What happened to the castle?
      • (Non-quest dialogue.)
    • What can you tell me about Uri?
      • Duke Horacio: Hm? Uri was the undertaker that helped organise the farewell of my dear Oriana. He was very accommodating; I admit in my grief I asked a lot of him but he never complained. Perhaps the kindest gesture was that he allowed me to organise a casket of Oriana's belongings to be placed with her. One of those things being the letters we exchanged when we first met. Oh, Ori, I miss you so.

Reldo[edit | edit source]

  • (Only on first time after the quest:)
    • Reldo Player! What a pleasure to see you alive! Tell me did you solve that cursed clue scroll?
    • Player I did! The magic led me to a hidden chamber beneath McGrubor's Wood where I found the resting place of Charos.
    • (Before finding all the necklace trinkets:)
      • Reldo Incredible! What a discovery!
      • Player It really was, although I'm just glad that clue scroll is behind me.
      • (Continues below)
    • (After finding all the necklace trinkets:)
      • Player Well, at least we thought it was his resting place...
      • Reldo What are you saying?
      • Player I think that's a story for another day. I'm just glad that clue scroll is behind me.
      • (Continues below)
    • Reldo Me too. Thank you, Player. I'm finally free of having to be the bearer of such bad news.

Uri[edit | edit source]

  • Uri: It feels so good to be me again!
    • What are you going to do now?
      • Uri: Do? Up until now I was struggling to even BE! Can you imagine floating in the Spirit Plane, waiting for a shadow of yourself to lose concentration, so you can creep into the real world? So yeah, I haven't got much of an itinerary! For now, I'll be helping adventurers clear up my treasures, and looking for information on Charos.
      • (Shows previous options)
    • So, graverobbing?
      • Uri: Even then, when I was younger, I wasn't proud of it. I bet whatever I could get my hands on at the Duel Arena. Not on myself, of course, I couldn't fight for toffee. I was addicted to staking on other warriors. But the luck and money would sometimes run out. Graverobbing was lucrative, and it wasn't hurting anyone that wasn't already hurt. At the time, it made sense. Less sense now, of course. Let's call it a lesson learned.
      • (Shows previous options)
    • About the necklace of Charos...
      • (Having lost the necklace:)
        • Uri: You lost it? You're lucky there's a charm on it that ensures is returns here safely.
        • Uri returns the necklace to you.
        • Uri: Now, what was I saying?
        • (Continues below)
      • (Before finding all the trinkets:)
        • Uri: Oh yes, the necklace. If you have the time, and I know you are busy, then I would welcome you using it. Follow its trail, find out what Charos did with his life, where he went. I think we both have questions that we would like answered. Just be aware, the magic in the necklace is weak. It will only detect the location of the jade trinkets when you are close by.
        • (Shows previous options)
      • (After finding all the trinkets:)
        • (Before showing the necklace:)
          • Uri: You did it? You did it! Let me see.
          • (Without the necklace of Charos:)
            • Player: I didn't bring it with me...
            • Uri: Go quickly and bring it to me. I need to see it.
            • (Shows previous options)
          • Player: I have reason to be believe that Charos is alive. He may even have been the person who asked you to bury his body!
          • Uri: Charos, you sly dog! I KNEW there was something wrong with his body. It was just too flawless: like someone was making the perfect version of themselves. Well, if Charos is still alive, perhaps we can use the necklace to find him? Let me see. I'll try to get it working fully. Hmmm. It's warm, and it's releasing a very light pulse of magic. But I know this magic... where have I seen it before? ... The gnomes! Yes, it's a magic that the gnomes use. Anti-illusion magic! Well, I'll be. I may be wrong here, but I think that the necklace reveals true identities. If there is anyone using magic to hide themselves, this necklace will discover them. Charos, you trickster, what is your game here? My guess is this is a key to finding Charos. If he has been hiding in plain sight, then this would reveal him. Let me do some research. I think I can amplify the magic. You would be able to reveal illusions around you. Maybe even Charos. That should make it more useful. Come back later - I will keep you updated.
        • (After showing the necklace:)
          • Uri: I need to do some research. I think I can amplify the necklace's magic. With it, you would be able to reveal illusions around you. Maybe even Charos. That should make it more useful. Come back later - I will keep you updated.
          • (Shows previous options)
    • Take care, Uri.
      • Uri: Oh, I intend to. Farewell.