Dialogue for Wizard Goldberg

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This transcript involves dialogue with Wizard Goldberg and the player.

Standard dialogue[edit | edit source]

  • Wizard Goldberg: Good day to you, Player!
  • Select an option
    • Who are you?
      • Wizard Goldberg: Why, my boy, I am Wizard Goldberg: world-renowned inventor! Give me a lever long enough, a fulcrum on which to place it, some bellows and maybe a few tubes, and I could assemble a machine to move the world!
      • Goldberg seems to lose himself in this thought.
      • Wizard Goldberg: As long as the peacock kept hold of the spanner...
      • Player: Um... Wizard Golberg?
      • Wizard Goldberg: Oh, right, yes... This is my latest invention: the Rune Goldberg Machine! Which I believe has the potential to help us unravel the mysteries of magic!
      • Player: So how does it work?
      • Wizard Goldberg: Well, I haven't quite unravelled the mysteries of the machine itself yet, so I'm letting everyone take a crack at it.
      • (Shows initial options)
    • What's this machine?
      • Wizard Goldberg: This is my latest and most fabulous invention: the Rune Goldberg Machine! It will take your ordinary, unremarkable runes and turn them into purest vis wax!
      • Select an option
        • Vis wax?
          • Wizard Goldberg: Wax! Simply place three runes into the Rune Goldberg Machine and watch them be transformed! She's a bit temperamental, that machine. Some runes work better than others. You might need to do some experimentation.
          • (Shows initial options)
        • Go on...
    • What can vis wax be used for?
      • Wizard Goldberg: I'm sure it has plenty of uses, my boy! I'm told it can make your auras last longer, if that's something you have trouble with. It's highly prized by challenge masters for its rich waxiness. They'll let you change or extend your challenges in exchange for a good dollop of the stuff. It can even be used to increase the amount you can gather from divine locations - really! Using one simple trick discovered by a housewife! That is to say, my wife.
      • (Shows initial options)
    • Can you help me with the machine?
      • Wizard Goldberg: Hrrrrm... She's a fickle machine, so what worked for your friends yesterday may not work for you today. I do know that the top slot seems to work the same for everyone... And there's a fair chance you know someone who'll have the same experience with the middle as you... But the bottom is a mystery that you alone can solve.
      • Unknown condition 1:
        • Wizard Goldberg: If you're stuck, my good friend, ((A Player Name)), had an interesting hypothesis. Hmmm... What was it now? Ah, yes! '((A Rune)) runes may be worth investigating.' That was it. If you'd like to dispute ((A Player's Name))'s findings, do show me a different rune and I'll pass your advice along.
        • Player: You don't really seem to know how your own machine works.
        • Wizard Goldberg: Oh, heavens no! I was trying to invent an automatic egg boiler!
        • (Shows initial options)
      • Unknown condition 2:
        • Wizard Goldberg: I'm afraid I can't help you anymore than that. But if you figure that works well, show me a rune and I'll suggest it to anyone that gets stuck.
        • (Shows initial options)
    • How did you know my name?
      • Wizard Goldberg: Why, I used my Name Goldberg Machine, of course!
      • Goldberg indicates a series of seemingly ordinary screwdrivers that have been tied together with fishing line. He offers no further explanation.
      • (Shows initial options)

Using runes on him[edit | edit source]

  • Wizard Goldberg: <Type> runes, eh? Fascinating... Should I recommend those to other[sic] for their experiments?
  • <Type> runes: Do you recommend these to other players?
    • Yes.
      • Wizard Goldberg: Splendid! I'll share this knowledge with the world.
    • No.
      • (Dialogue ends)

Using the machine after generating vis wax in the same day[edit | edit source]

  • Wizard Goldberg: It's only safe to turn the machine to full power once a day. You won't be able to get anything more from it until tomorrow.