Dialogue for Wise Old Man

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This transcript involves dialogue with Wise Old Man and the player.

First time dialogue[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, Player. Wait, wait, wait. Before we get started, are you here about my archaeology collection?
  • Do you want to talk about Archaeology?
    • Yes.
      • (Same as below)
    • No.
      • Player: So you're a wise old man, huh?
      • Wise Old Man: Less of the 'old' man, if you please! But yes, I suppose you could say that. I prefer to think of myself as a sage.
      • Player: So what's a sage doing here?
      • Wise Old Man: I've spent most of my life studying this world in which we live. I've strode through the depths of the deadliest dungeons, roamed the murky jungles of Karamja, meditated on the glories of Saradomin on Entrana, and read dusty tomes in the Library of Varrock. Now I'm not as young as I used to be, I'm settling here where it's peaceful. It's a pity about that vampyre that keeps attacking the village. At least Saradomin protects me.
      • Player: That's quite an exciting life you've had.
      • Wise Old Man: Exciting? Yes, I suppose so. Now I'm here, perhaps I could offer you the benefit of my experience and wisdom?
      • Player: Thanks! So how can you help me?
      • Wise Old Man: Well, I imagine you've gathered up quite a lot of stuff on your travels. Things you used for quests a long time ago that you don't need now. If you like, I can look through your bank and see if there's anything you can chuck away. Alternatively, you can bring items here and show them to me. If I see that it's something you don't need, I'll let you know. I might even be willing to buy it.
      • Player: So you'll help me clear junk out of my bank?
      • Wise Old Man: Yes, that's right. Or I'd be happy to chat with you about the wonders of this world!
      • What would you like to say?
        • Could I have some free stuff, please?
          • Player: Could I have some free stuff, please?
          • Wise Old Man: Deary deary me... I'm not giving out free money, but I'd be happy to reward you if you'll do a little job for me.
          • What would you like to say?
            • Ok, what do you want me to do?
              • Player: Ok, what do you want me to do?
              • Wise Old Man: I'm sure I can think of a few little jobs. This won't be a quest, mind you, just a little favour... I'm a bit hungry. I'd like some cooked meat, not chicken or any sort of bird. And definitely not camel or rabbit either! Please bring me 3.
              • What would you like to say?
                • Where can I get that?
                  • Player: Where can I get that?
                  • Wise Old Man: Just cook some beef, rat or bear.
                  • Player: Right, I'll see you later.
                • Right, I'll see you later.
                  • (Transcript missing. edit)
            • Thanks, maybe some other time.
              • (Transcript missing. edit)
        • I'd just like to ask you something.
          • (Same as below)
        • Is there anything I can do for you?
          • (Same as below)
        • Could you check my things for junk, please?
          • (Same as below)
        • Thanks, maybe some other time.
          • (Transcript missing. edit)

When talked to[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, Player.
  • Wise Old Man: Wait, wait, wait. Before we get started, are you here about my archaeology collection?
  • Do you want to talk about Archaeology?
    • Yes.
      • Wise Old Man: Excellent. Let's get to it, then!
      • Select an option
        • Who are you?
          • Wise Old Man: I'm the Wise Old Man. Next question!
          • (Shows previous options)
        • What are you collecting?
          • Wise Old Man: Would you like a simple list or a bit of a chinwag?
          • What would you like to do?
            • View collections.
              • (Hats and Hedgewizardry interface opens.)
            • Talk about collections.
              • Wise Old Man: My tastes are what you might call eclectic. I like collecting artefacts related to music, magical power and, above all else, knowledge!
              • Wise Old Man: Also hats.
              • Wise Old Man: I like hats.
              • Player: That is eclectic. I think, perhaps, I Should just look at your lists.
              • Wise Old Man: Good idea!
              • (Shows previous-to-previous options)
        • What are your collection rewards?
          • Wise Old Man: Hmm, well, I have a couple of relics of relic-adjacent items...
          • If players have not completed the music artefacts collection:
            • Wise Old Man: If you complete my music collection, I'll give you this needle off my old gramophone!
            • Player: The needle off a gramophone? Do you hate me or something?
            • Wise Old Man: My, my, hey, hey! No, nothing like that. It's an old gramophone and I need a new one anyway. The original needle broke off years ago, so I found a makeshift replacement.
            • Wise Old Man: It was some old magical relic I had sitting around, used to belong to a fellow named Koschei.
            • Player: Wait, the Fremennik? Koschei the Deathless? And you just used some magical needle of his to play music?
            • Wise Old Man: Well, who wants to live forever, anyway?
            • Wise Old Man: If you return it to him, I suspect he will reward you for your efforts.
          • If players have completed the music artefacts collection:
            • Wise Old Man: See, I'm still alive. Maybe with that needle, you'll live as long as I have!
            • (Having lost the needle:)
              • Player: Not if I lost the needle, though...
              • Wise Old Man: Then it's a good job I have a box of them upstairs.
              • (Without space in backpack:)
                • Wise Old Man: But you need to make room for one more.
              • (With space in backpack:)
                • Wise Old Man: This should bring your quest back to life.
                • TAKE KOSCHEI'S NEEDLE FROM THE WISE OLD MAN?
                  • Yes.
                    • Player receives Koschei's needle.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • No.
                    • (Dialogue ends)
            • (Not having lost the needle, before obtaining the relic:)
              • Player: Though, I should probably return this to Koschei first...
              • (Continues below)
            • (After obtaining the relic:)
              • Player: Perhaps so.
              • (Continues below)
          • If players have not completed the knowledge artefacts collection:
            • Wise Old Man: Ah, yes, I think you might be interested in this one. I have the very first enchanted gem, created by Amascut herself, and used by the Order of Slayer masters to set tasks.
            • Wise Old Man: So, whenever you pick up a new assignment, you can set your task count to either the minimum or maximum amount of kills required to complete it! Neat, hey?
            • Wise Old Man: I also have a lot of chronotes, and I mean a LOT!
          • If players have completed the knowledge artefacts collection:
            • Wise Old Man: How goes the min/maxing of your Slayer assignments?
            • Wise Old Man: I only have a regular amount of chronotes left.
          • (Shows previous options)
        • Bye.
          • Wise Old Man: Farewell, Player.
    • No.
      • (With a construction contract for wise old man:)
        • SELECT AN OPTION
          • Ask about contracts.
            • SELECT AN OPTION
              • What do you need repairing?
                • Wise Old Man: Let me see, right now I need you to repair the following pieces of furniture.
                • Wise Old Man: [Furniture 1], [Furniture 2], [Furniture 3], [Furniture 4], [Furniture 5]
                • (Shows previous options)
              • What materials do I need?
                • Wise Old Man: You need: Planks x [number], Steel nails x [number]
                • (Shows previous options)
              • [Leave]
                • (Dialogue ends)
          • Ask about something else.
            • (Continues below)
      • What would you like to say?
        • (Only if you lack a task and don't have a quest cape:)
          • Is there anything I can do for you?
            • Wise Old Man: I'm sure I can think of a few little jobs. This won't be a quest, mind you, just a little favour...
            • (The Wise Old Man gives a task.)
        • (Only if you have a task:)
          • What did you ask me to do?
            • (The Wise Old Man repeats the task.)
        • (Only with all quests completed:)
          • I'd like to buy a Quest Point Cape, quest.
            • Zenevivia: Still doing quests, eh? Bah, you adventurers!
            • Wise Old Man: Zinny still hasn't given up on that topic. Now, Quest Capes cost 99,000 coins.
              • Player: Yes
                • Wise Old Man: Have fun with it.
              • Player: Actually, forget it.
        • Could you check my things for junk, please?
          • Choose an option:
            • Could you check my bank for junk, please?
            • Wise Old Man: Certainly, but I should warn you that I don't know about all items.
            • (Item Cleanup interface for bank opens.)
          • Could you check my inventory for junk, please?
            • Wise Old Man: Certainly, but I should warn you that I don't know about all items.
            • (If there is junk in inventory:)
              • (Item Cleanup interface for backpack opens.
            • (If there isn't junk in inventory:)
              • Wise Old Man: There doesn't seem to be any junk in your inventory at all.
          • (Only with beast of burden summoned:)
            • Could you check my beast of burden for junk, please?
              • Wise Old Man: Certainly, but I should warn you that I don't know about all items.
              • (If there is junk in beast of burden:)
                • (Item Cleanup interface for beast of burden opens.
              • (If there isn't junk in beast of burden:)
                • Wise Old Man: There doesn't seem to be any junk in your beast of burden at all.
        • I've got something I'd like you to look at.
          • Player: I've got something I'd like you to look at.
          • Wise Old Man: Jolly good. Give it to me, and I'll tell you anything I know about it.
        • I'd just like to ask you something.
          • Player: I'd just like to ask you something.
          • Wise Old Man: Please do!
          • Pick a topic
            • Distant lands
              • Pick a topic
                • The Wilderness
                  • Player: Could you tell me about the Wilderness, please?
                  • Wise Old Man: Many years ago, when the foul Zamorak was doing battle with the forces of Saradomin, the northern reaches of this continent were blasted by his evil magic, transforming a vast area into a barren wasteland of rocks and lava.
                  • Wise Old Man: The spirits of the monsters that perished in this cataclysm are still roaming the Wilderness, even today, hunting for people to slaughter in their endless desire for revenge. They are incredibly dangerous, far more deadly than other monsters.
                  • Wise Old Man: However, it's still often worth the risk of entering the Wilderness. There are treasures in the Wilderness that are scarce elsewhere, and some of the other monsters are popular for combat training. There are even arenas where you can fight other people like yourself!
                  • Wise Old Man: If you dare to go to the far north-west of the Wilderness, there's a building called the Mage Arena where you can learn to summon the power of Saradomin himself!
                  • (Continues below)
                • Misty jungles
                  • Player: What can you tell me about jungles?
                  • Wise Old Man: If it's a jungle you want, look no further than the southern regions of Karamja.
                  • Wise Old Man: Once you get south of Brimhaven, the whole island is pretty much covered in exotic trees, creepers and shrubs.
                  • Wise Old Man: There's a small settlement called Tai Bwo Wannai Village in the middle of the island. It's a funny place; the chieftain's an unfriendly chap and his sons are barking mad.
                  • Wise Old Man: Honestly, one of them asked me to stuff a dead monkey with seaweed so he could EAT it!
                  • (If Tai Bwo Wannai Village is complete:)
                    • Player: Yes, I've met them.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: Further south you'll find Shilo Village. It's been under attack by terrifying zombies in recent months, if my sources are correct.
                  • (If Shilo Village is complete:)
                    • Player: I've dealt with them, although there are a few still knocking about.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: The jungle's filled with nasty creatures. There are vicious spiders that you can hardly see before they try to bite your legs off, and great big jungle ogres.
                  • (Continues below)
                • Underground domains
                  • Player: Tell me about what's underground.
                  • Wise Old Man: Oh, the dwarven realms?
                  • Wise Old Man: Yes, there was a time, back in the Fourth Age, when we humans wouldn't have been able to venture underground. That was before we had magic; the dwarves were quite a threat.
                  • Wise Old Man: Still, it's much more friendly now. You can visit the vast dwarven mine if you like; the entrance is on the mountain north of Falador.
                  • Wise Old Man: If you go further west you may be able to visit the dwarven city of Keldagrim. But they were a bit cautious about letting humans in, last time I asked.
                  • Wise Old Man: On the other hand, if you go west of Brimhaven, you'll find a huge underground labyrint full of giants, demons, dogs and dragons to fight. It's even bigger than the caves under Taverley, although the Taverley dungeon's pretty good for training your combat skills.
                  • (Continues below)
                • Mystical realms
                  • Player: What mystical realms can I visit?
                  • (If you haven't completed Lost City:)
                    • Wise Old Man: The fabled Lost City of Zanaris has an entrance somewhere near here. Perhaps some day you'll go there.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you have completed Lost City:)
                    • Wise Old Man: Well, you've been to Zanaris. I met a fairy years ago who said she lived there. She was an incredible warrior, considering that she wasn't even a metre tall.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: Also, in my research I came across ancient references to some kind of Abyss. Demons from the Abyss have already escaped into this land; Saradomin be thanked that they are very rare!
                  • (If you have completed The Golem:)
                    • Player: I've been through a portal into the lair of some ancient demon. It was in the city of Uzer.
                    • Wise Old Man: Ah, Uzer. A city much favoured by Saradomin, destroyed by Thammaron, the elder-demon, late in the Third Age.
                    • Player: Yeah, there isn't much left there.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (Continues below)
            • Strange beasts
              • Pick a topic
                • Biggest & Baddest
                  • Player: Tell me about mighty monsters.
                  • Wise Old Man: There's a mighty fire-breathing dragon living underground in the deep Wilderness, known as the King Black Dragon. It's a fearsome beast, with a breath that can poison you, freeze you to the ground or incinerate you where you stand.
                  • Wise Old Man: But even more deadly is the Queen of the Kalphites. As if her giant mandibles of death were not enough, she also throws her spines at her foes with deadly force. She can even cast rudimentary spells.
                  • Wise Old Man: Some dark power must be protecting her, for she can block attacks using prayer just as humans do.
                  • Wise Old Man: Another beast that's worthy of a special mention is the Shaikahan. It dwells in the eastern reaches of Karamja, and is almost impossible to kill except with specially prepared weapons.
                  • (If you've completed Tai Bwo Wannai Trio:)
                    • Player: Actually, that one's dead. I've been helping a barmy hunter who'd sworn to kill it.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: In the north, beyond the troll lands, there is a cavern where an endless battle rages between the forces of Saradomin and those of Zamorak.
                  • Wise Old Man: Saradomin's forces are led by the icyene warrior Commander Zilyana, Keeper of the Faith. According to legend, she takes the form of a collossal[sic] woman with wings.
                  • Wise Old Man: Zamorak's forces are led by K'ril Tsutsaroth, a demon of devastating power. Around their encampment is a mystical darkness that no lantern can alleviate.
                  • Wise Old Man: Two minor armies are loosely allied with the Saradominist force. One consists of bird-like creatures, the Aviansie. Another consists of mindless monsters such as ogres and orks. The leaders of those armies are terrifying creatures in their own right, although inferior by far to Zilyana.
                  • Wise Old Man: Beyond the Fremennik lands dwell the fearsome Dagannoth Kings, reptillian[sic] creatures of the deep. There are three of them, fighting with melee, magic and ranged attacks respectively, on a small island at the bottom of a labyrinthine cavern.
                  • (If Summer's End is completed:)
                    • Wise Old Man: More recently, a new monster appeared in the world. It is known simply as the Corporeal Beast.
                    • Player: I've seen it.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (Continues below)
                • Poison and how to survive it
                  • Player: What does poison do?
                  • Wise Old Man: Many monsters use poison against their foes. If you get poisoned, you will not feel it at the time, but later you will begin to suffer its effects, and your life will drain slowly from you.
                  • Wise Old Man: Over time the effects dwindle to nothing, but if you had already been wounded you might die before they wear off completely.
                  • Wise Old Man: Fortunately, followers of Guthix have devised potions that can cure the poison or even give immunity to it.
                  • Wise Old Man: Should you wish to use poison against your own enemies and those of our Lord Saradomin, there is a potion that you can smear on your daggers, arrows, spears, javelins and throwing knives.
                  • (Continues below)
                • Wealth through slaughter
                  • Player: What monsters drop good items?
                  • Wise Old Man: As a general rule, tougher monsters drop more valuable items. But even a lowly hobgoblin can drop valuable gems; it just does this extremely rarely.
                  • Wise Old Man: If you can persuade the Slayer Masters to train you as a Slayer, you will be able to fight certain monsters that drop valuable items far more often.
                  • Wise Old Man: You might care to invest in an enchanted dragonstone ring. These are said to make a monster drop its most valuable items a little more often.
                  • (Continues below)
            • Days gone by
              • Pick a topic
                • Heroic figures
                  • Player: Tell me about valiant heroes!
                  • Wise Old Man: Ha ha ha... There are plenty of heroes. Always have been, always will be, until the fall of the world.
                  • Wise Old Man: You're quite a noted adventurer yourself!
                  • Wise Old Man: But I suppose I could tell you of a couple...
                  • Wise Old Man: Yes, there was a man named Arrav. No-one knew where he came from, but he was a fearsome fighter, a skilful hunter and a remarkable farmer. He lived in the ancient settlement of Avarrocka, defending it from goblins, until he went forth in search of some strange artifact long desired by the dreaded Mahjarrat.
                  • (With Defender of Varrock incomplete:)
                    • Player: Perhaps some day I shall be able to tell you what became of him.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (With Defender of Varrock completed:)
                    • Player: That can't have worked out very well for him. He became a slave of Zemouregal.
                    • Wise Old Man: The life of a hero has its occupation hazards.
                    • (With The Curse of Arrav incomplete:)
                      • Player: It's exciting, though!
                      • (Continues below)
                    • (With The Curse of Arrav complete:)
                      • Player: I've retrieved his heart from Zemouregal's base.
                      • Wise Old Man: Well done.
                      • Player: Thank you. It wasn't easy.
                      • (Continues below)
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: But do not let your head be turned by heroics. Randas was another great man, but he let himself be beguiled into turning to serve Zamorak, and they say he is now a mindless creature deep in the Underground Pass that leads to Isafdar.
                  • (Continues below)
                • The origin of magic
                  • Player: Where did humans learn to use magic?
                  • Wise Old Man: Ah, that was quite a discovery! It revolutionised our way of life and jolted us into the Fifth Age of the world.
                  • Wise Old Man: They say a traveller in the north discovered the key, although no records state exactly what he found. From this he was able to summon the magic of four elements, using magic as a tool and a weapon. He and his followers learnt how to bind the power into little stones so that others could use it.
                  • Wise Old Man: In the land south of here they constructed an immense tower where the power could be studied, but followers of Zamorak destroyed it with fire many years ago, and most of the knowledge was lost.
                  • (Continues below)
                • Settlements
                  • Player: I suppose you'd know about the history of today's cities?
                  • Wise Old Man: Yes, there are fairly good records of the formation of the cities from primitive settlements.
                  • Wise Old Man: In the early part of the Fourth Age, of course, there were no permanent settlements. Tribes wandered the lands, staying where they could until the resources were exhausted.
                  • Wise Old Man: This changed as people learnt to grow crops and breed animals, and now there are very few of the old nomadic tribes. There's at least one tribe roaming between the Troll Stronghold and Rellekka, though.
                  • (With Mountain Daughter completed:)
                    • Player: Yes, I've met them. They're all mad.
                    • Wise Old Man: Truly, their faith in natural spirits is rather foolish, but they're a pleasant enough people.
                    • Wise Old Man: Anyway, what was I saying? Ah, yes...
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: One settlement was Avarrocka, a popular trading centre.
                  • Wise Old Man: In the west, Ardougne gradually formed under the leadership of the Carnillean family, despite the threat of the Mahjarrat warlord Hazeel who dwelt in that area until his downfall.
                  • (If you aided the cultists in Hazeel Cult:)
                    • Player: He'll be back, just you wait!
                    • Wise Old Man: Oh dear, I hope you haven't done anything rash!
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you aided the Carnillean family in Hazeel Cult:)
                  • Player: I've foiled a dastardly Zamorakian plot to have Hazeel resurrected.
                    • Wise Old Man: So I'd heard. Lord Saradomin is smiling on you.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (Continues below)
                • The Wise Old Man of Draynor Village
                  • Player: Tell me about yourself, old man.
                  • Wise Old Man: Ah, so you want to know about me, eh?
                  • Wise Old Man: Mmm... what could I say about myself? Let's see what I've done...
                  • Wise Old Man: I've delved into the dungeon west of Brimhaven and heard the terrifying CRASH of the steel dragons battling each other for territory.
                  • Wise Old Man: I spent some years on Entrana, where I learnt the techniques of pure meditation.
                  • Wise Old Man: I've wandered through the vast desert that lies south of Al Kharid and seen the great walls of Menaphos and Sophanem.
                  • (If you've completed Icthlarin's Little Helper:)
                    • Player: That feline statue you've got on your bookshelf there - I'm sure I saw something like that when I was in Sophanem.
                    • Wise Old Man: I've always liked to collect little trinkets to remind of the time when my life was more - ah - exciting.
                    • Player: So you've spoken to the Sphinx, then?
                    • Wise Old Man: Spoken to a sphinx, you say? My dear young man, you can't possibly be serious!
                    • Player: What do you mean?
                    • Wise Old Man: Ha ha ha! The people who live deep in the shifting sands of the desert will often tell travellers tall tales of strange beasts, but that doesn't mean any of it's remotely true!
                    • Player: But I've met the Sph...
                    • Wise Old Man: Please, adventurer, there is nothing to be gained by interfering in matters you do not understand.
                    • Wise Old Man: Even if such a creature were to exist...
                    • Player: ...which it does...
                    • Wise Old Man: EVEN IF SUCH A CREATURE WERE TO EXIST it would be terribly dangerous for you to get involved in its business.
                    • Wise Old Man: I have heard of terrible things happening to travellers in that land, and I would not wish for you to be dragged into anything like that.
                    • Wise Old Man: Indeed, I have heard of adventurers doing the most shameful and blasphemous deeds believing themselves to be acting on behalf of some false god!
                    • Player: Hmmm?
                    • Wise Old Man: So please do not speak to me of this matter again. Now, I believe I was telling you of my adventurous youth...
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Wise Old Man: Apart from all that, I've spent many a happy hour in dusty libraries, searching through ancient scrolls and texts for the wisdom of those who have passed on.
                  • Wise Old Man: Plus plenty of other adventures, quests, journeys...
                  • (Continues below)
            • Gods and demons
              • Pick a topic
                • Three gods?
                  • Player: I heard that the world used to have three gods.
                  • Wise Old Man: Indeed. That was correct: Saradomin, Guthix and Zamorak.
                  • Wise Old Man: Saradomin, the great and glorious, gives life to this world.
                  • Wise Old Man: Zamorak craves only death and destruction.
                  • Wise Old Man: Guthix, calling itself a god of 'balance', held no allegiance, but simply aided whatever cause suits its shifting purpose.
                  • Wise Old Man: Guthix, however, died not so long ago. Zamorak, after being defeated by Saradomin, was diminished for a time.
                  • (If The Dig Site is completed:)
                    • Player: So who's Zaros?
                    • Wise Old Man: What did you say?
                    • Player: I discovered a buried altar to a god called Zaros.
                    • Wise Old Man: Please, do not speak further of this. No good can come of meddling in such things.
                    • Player: So Zaros is real?
                    • Wise Old Man: Adventurer, my patience is limited. Speak to me no further of this - this - this foolishness.
                    • (With Desert Treasure completed:)
                      • Player: Does that mean I shouldn't ask you about the ancient magicks I learned in that pyramid north of Sophanem?
                      • Wise Old Man: ENOUGH! Begone from me, you foul trickster!
                  • (With Icthlarin's Little Helper complete and Desert Treasure incomplete:)
                    • Player: How about Tumeken, Elindis[sic], Icthlarin and the Devourer?
                    • Wise Old Man: What names are these?
                    • Player: Down in Sophanem, they've got a chief god named Tumeken, plus a fertility goddess named Elindis[sic]. Icthlarin is their god of the dead and the Devourer...
                    • Wise Old Man: Adventurer, what folly leads you to thinkg any of these - things, exist?
                    • Player: But I've met Icthlarin! He'd[sic] got a jackal's head!
                    • Wise Old Man: It is hot in that land, and the heat can affect a traveller in strange ways. Tell me, when you met 'Icthlarin', had you been feeling at all unwell?
                    • Player: Well, now you mention it, I'd just been hypnotised by a weird woman I met in the desert.
                    • Wise Old Man: So a strange woman interfered with your mind, then you met a man with the head of a jackal, and you decided he must be a god?
                    • Player: Umm...
                    • Wise Old Man: Well, make sure you don't get hypnotised again, and I'm sure you'll not meet any more jackal-headed men claiming to be gods!
                    • Player: But...?
                    • Wise Old Man: It'd probably be best if you don't go there again.
                    • Player: But you've been all around that area, haven't you? When you were travelling?
                    • Wise Old Man: Indeed, I have.
                    • Player: So you'd know all about their gods?
                    • Wise Old Man: I know what I know.
                    • Wise Old Man: And knowing what I know, I do not speak of this matter. Perhaps you would be wise to heed my example.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (With Temple of Ikov complete, but not Desert Treasure:)
                    • Player: I've heard of another god, called Armadyl.
                    • Wise Old Man: What is this of which you speak?
                    • Player: A strange man asked me to go into the Temple of Ikov and steal the Staff of Armadyl.
                    • Wise Old Man: And what makes you believe in this 'Armadyl'?
                    • Player: Well, there were servants of Armadyl living down in the depths of the temple. They'd been there for generations, guarding the staff.
                    • Wise Old Man: So you trusted the word of these people who had been sitting down a hole all their lives?
                    • Player: Um... Yes, I suppose so.
                    • Wise Old Man: I wouldn't worry about this sacred 'armadyllo' anymore. Just another foolish myth.
                    • (If you sided with the Guardians of Armadyl:)
                      • Player: Oh well, the servants rewarded me very kindly for defeating Lucien for them.
                      • Wise Old Man: That is an impressive feat, adventurer. Truly you must be beloved in the eyes of Saradomin.
                    • (If you sided with Lucien:)
                      • Player: It's lucky there's no Armadyl! I've pinched his staff and given it to Lucien.
                      • Wise Old Man: YOU'VE DONE WHAT?
                      • Wise Old Man: Adventurer, I beg of you, do not meddle in the gods' affairs. No good can come of it.
                • The wars of the gods
                  • Player: I wanna know about the wars of the gods!
                  • Wise Old Man: Ah, the first war was terrible time. The armies of Saradomin fought gloriously against the minions of Zamorak, but many brave warriors and noble cities were overthrown and destroyed utterly.
                  • (With The Golem complete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: You have visited Uzer, and seen for yourself the damage that could be wrought by an elder-demon in its wrath.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • Player: How did it end?
                  • Wise Old Man: Before the Zamorakian forces could be utterly routed, Lord Saradomin took pity on them and the battle-scarred world, and allowed a truce.
                  • Wise Old Man: All was quiet for thousands of years, but not so long ago Zamorak and Saradomin both returned to Gielinor!
                  • Wise Old Man: Fortunately, the power of Lord Saradomin was sufficient to send Zamorak back to where he came from.
                  • (Continues below)
                • The Mahjarrat
                  • Player: What are the Mahjarrat?
                  • Wise Old Man: Very little is written about the tribe of the Mahjarrat. They are believed to be from a realm of Freneskae, or Frenaskrae - the spelling in this tongue is only approximate.
                  • Wise Old Man: One of them, the foul Zamorak, has achieved godhood, although none know how this came about.
                  • Wise Old Man: Other Mahjarrat who have been particularly active upon this plane are Hazeel, Lucien, Azzanadra and Zemouregal.
                  • (If you foiled the cultists in Hazeel Cult:)
                    • Player: I've foiled a dastardly Zamorakian plot to have Hazeel resurrected.
                    • Wise Old Man: So I'd heard. Lord Saradomin is smiling on you.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you aided the cultists in Hazeel Cult:)
                    • Player: Hazeel will rise again, you'll see!
                    • Wise Old Man: Adventurer, your actions fill me with concern!
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you aided the guardians in Temple of Ikov:)
                    • Player: I've defeated Lucien.
                    • Wise Old Man: Truly, your bravery exceeds your stature. But I fear his defeat will not be permanent.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you didn't aid the guardians in Temple of Ikov:)
                    • Player: I've met Lucien. He paid me very nicely for bringing him a staff he wanted.
                    • Wise Old Man: Traveller, I beg of you, do not have further dealings with such creatures! You do not know their power as I do.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (With Desert Treasure complete:)
                    • Player: Azzanadra taught me some ancient magical powers after I unlocked the pyramid where he had been trapped.
                    • Wise Old Man: Leave me, traveller; I am old, and your words fill me with horror.
                  • (With Defender of Varrock complete and with Desert Treasure incomplete:)
                    • (Transcript missing. edit)
                • Wielding the power of the gods
                  • Player: Can I wield the power of Saradomin myself?
                  • (If you didn't start learning Saradomin Strike before it was removed:)
                    • Wise Old Man: On completing the trials to use the Mage Arena, you can wield the cloak and staff of Saradomin. You will then be able to cast the Saradomin Strike spell, which summons his power against your foe.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (If you started learning Saradomin Strike before it was removed:)
                    • Wise Old Man: I see you are already learning to summon the power of Saradomin.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (Continues below)
            • Something to do with you...
              • Pick a topic
                • Your hat!
                  • Player: I want to ask you about your hat.
                  • (With Love Story incomplete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: Why, thank you! I rather like it myself.
                      • You should give it back, you know.
                        • Wise Old Man: No, I think I'll keep it.
                        • Player: But...
                        • Wise Old Man: Now that you've got that off your chest, would you like to ask me about anything else?
                      • How can I get a hat like that?
                        • Wise Old Man: Ahh, sadly these hats are now very rare. Maybe some other player would be willing to sell you theirs, but it would be incredibly expensive.
                        • Player: Can I buy your hat?
                        • Wise Old Man: Ohhh no, I don't intend to part with this.
                  • (With Love Story complete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: Why, thank you! I think it really suits her.
                    • Zenevivia: Dissy, you're so sweet.
                    • Wise Old Man: Any other questions?
                    • (Continues below)
                • That quest we did together...
                  • Player: That was quite an exciting quest we did together!
                  • Wise Old Man: Oh yes, it was certainly a fitting end to my adventuring days. Your fight against the Sea Troll Queen was highly impressive!
                  • Player: Are you tempted to go on another quest in the future?
                  • (If Love Story is incomplete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: No, I feel I am a bit old for that kind of thing now. New times need new heroes, and I'm sure you'll always be there to answer the call!
                    • Player: I'll certainly see what I can do.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (With Love Story complete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: No, Zinny and I aren't interested in that kind of adventure.
                    • Zenevivia: Quite right. People should solve their own problems instead of sitting around waiting for an adventurer to help them.
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (Continues below)
                • Your retirement
                  • Player: When we finished fighting those sea trolls, you said you'd finished with adventuring, didn't you?
                  • (With Love Story incomplete:)
                    • Wise Old Man: Yes, that's right. I'm an old man, there's no denying it, and I need a nice quiet retirement. Besides, I think you've proved that the new generation has its own heroes and adventurers - I should step back and let you get on with it!
                    • Player: Does this mean you're not going to do any more big robberies?
                    • Wise Old Man: Well, since you saved my life when we were fighting the Sea Troll Queen, I don't mind telling you... I trust you won't tell anyone about this?
                    • Player: Go on...
                    • Wise Old Man: I might just have something in mind. After all, that little bank incident went very smoothly.
                    • Player: But you're retired!
                    • Wise Old Man: I retired from adventuring and questing. The episode in the bank was hardly a quest, more like a shopping trip!
                    • Player: Your shopping trip killed 3 bank staff and several innocent bystanders, not to mention the watchman!
                    • Wise Old Man: I've saved countless villages from unspeakable terrors and slain innumerable evil monsters - surely I deserve some sort of reward in return? Yet what did I get? NOTHING! You yourself would get pretty angry if you did a long and dangerous quest and didn't get any reward from it, eh? I'm sure you would! Well, imagine how I felt at the end of a long life of questing when[sic] was left penniless, and I have to move into this thief-infested village? This little shack was falling apart when I arrived! You go speak to the hag who keeps looking through my window - she'll show you how it used to look before I could afford to redecorate it! Being noble and virtuous doesn't put food on the table, and I don't intend to sit in banks begging like so many people do these days.
                    • Player: So all those quests in the past, when you saved people from monsters and stuff like that... you only helped them because you wanted a reward?
                    • Wise Old Man: No, it wasn't always like that. I used to be satisfied just knowing that I'd helped, and that was reward enough. But eventually I realised that people forgot about me as soon as the danger was gone, and I wasn't even getting paid properly for my services. Sometimes they offered me training in the various skills, but that's no use to me! I eventually realised that the only way I could get a proper reward for my life's efforts is if I took the reward myself. So I took up my cape and staff and headed for the bank.
                    • Player: And now you're planning to do another robbery? Didn't you get enough from the bank?
                    • Wise Old Man: Perhaps not... But enough of this matter!
                    • (Continues below)
                  • (After Love Story:)
                    • Wise Old Man: That's right. Zinny and I don't do that sort of thing. Is there anything else you'd like to ask?
                    • (Continues below)

Other questions[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Is there anything else you'd like to ask?
  • What would you like to say?
    • Yes please.
    • Thanks, maybe some other time.
      • Player: Thanks, maybe some other time.
      • Wise Old Man: As you wish. Farewell, Player.

Using items on him[edit | edit source]

Combat item[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Do you think I need to keep this?
  • Wise Old Man: I suppose you could use that in combat.
  • Player: Thanks, old man.

Low-value runes[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Do you think I need to keep this?
  • (Wise Old Man takes five runes from you.)
  • Wise Old Man: Runes are very useful things, but I'll take some of those off your hands for you.

High-value runes[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Do you think I need to keep this?
  • Wise Old Man: Ooh, runes? Yes, they're quite valuable.

Items with no information[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Do you think I need to keep this?
  • Wise Old Man: I couldn't really say whether or not you'll need that.
  • Wise Old Man: Please remember that I do not know about all items.

Searching through his bookcases without having talked to him first[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: It'd be politer to come and talk to me before you start messing around with my possessions!

After peering through the telescope[edit | edit source]

  • Player: I see you've got your telescope pointing at the Wizards' Tower.
  • Wise Old Man: Oh, do I? Well, why does that interest you?
  • Player: Well, you robbed a bank, and I bet you're now planning something to do with that Tower?
  • Wise Old Man: No, no, I'm not planning anything like that again.
  • Player: Well, I'll be watching you...

After finding all the R.U.N.E.F.E.S.T. penguins[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, Player.
  • Player: Hey, some penguins were spying and they had a bit of paper with your name on it!
  • Wise Old Man: Well well, that is curious indeed.
  • Player: What does it mean?!
  • Wise Old Man: I have my suspicions, but for now I wouldn't worry. I'll keep a close eye out, and we'll see what their next move is!
  • You've warned the Wise Old Man and have unlocked a skill chip!
  • (If there isn't space in the player's inventory:)
    • You have earned a small prismatic lamp, but you don't have any space for it. Talk to Skillchipx when you have space to claim it.
    • (Continues below.)
  • (If there is space in the player's inventory:)
    • You have earned a small prismatic lamp. It has been added to your inventory.
    • (Continues below.)
  • (If the player has unlocked all the skill chips:)
    • Congratulations! You've completed this year's RuneFest tasks for Skillchipx!
    • You have earned a medium prismatic lamp. It has been added to your inventory.
    • (Continues below.)
  • (Continues normally.)

With Wilough's red envelope[edit | edit source]

  • Wise Old Man: Greetings, Player.
  • Wise Old Man: Hello! What can I do for you?
  • Player: I'm here to deliver a letter to you from Wilough.
  • Wise Old Man: Oh! Splendid! Let's have a look.
  • The Wise Old Man opens the envelope and begins to read the letter.
  • Wise Old Man: What a lovely...
  • Wise Old Man: Oh...
  • Wise Old Man: Oh no.
  • Wise Old Man: What is this language!?
  • Wise Old Man: What the heck is steamed ham!?
  • Wise Old Man: Youngsters these days have no respect!
  • The Wise Old Man grumbles.
  • Wise Old Man: Alright... on with you then.
  • Player: I'm sorry.
  • (Continues normally.)