Dialogue for The Chef

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This transcript or section is incomplete and could do with improvement.
Reason: Missing Dialogue from later voyages. Also, when the Biologist and Chef are both in port.
You can discuss this issue on the talk page or edit this page to improve it.

Standard[edit | edit source]

  • The Chef: Woah! Don't sneak up on me like that!
  • Player: How are you doing, Carlos?
    • Before Perfect Flavour
      • The Chef: I would go and explore more of the port, but I am already in my apron.
    • After Perfect Flavour
      • The Chef: I wonder if someone around here will let me use them as a taste tester. I'm almost certain I won't poison them.
    • After Toxins
      • The Chef: Barrel here, barrel there. I'd better label them. Don't want to cook the wrong stuff!
    • After Boiling Over
      • The Chef: I'm glad the villagers are okay. I would hate to have made them all ill. Still a bit of a mystery, though!
    • After To The Ship
      • The Chef: Just the thought of what happened to those poor hunters... Sends shivers down my spine!
    • After Barrels of Mystery
      • The Chef: I need to master the spoon-lasso-trap. It worked flawlessly against that cactus I tested it on!
    • After Reinforcement
      • The Chef: First I was determined to cook the creature, but I changed my mind after seeing that goop!
    • After Once More Into the Breach
      • The Chef: Next time I am out at the mine, I bet I can find some nice fungi to cook up. I tried some...didn't make me feel funny or anything.
    • After Recipe Number 132: Fresh Idea
      • The Chef: I wonder if I can cook those rocks. If the creatures can eat them, why can't I?
  • Player: I could use your help.
    • The Chef: You need something sliced, diced and cooked? I'm on my way!
      • Voyage screen opens
  • Player: Do you prefer to work alone?
    • Without the Biologist unlocked
      • The Chef: I like to work with people who study nature and can point me at the tastiest stuff.
      • Unlock the Biologist (90 Herblore required) to unlock additional joint voyages.
    • With the Biologist unlocked and not present
      • The Chef: I need to absorb information about herbs and such. There's a biologist around here who might just have what I need.
      • If the Biologist and Chef are in port at the same time, additional joint voyages will be made available.
    • With the Biologist unlocked and present
      • missing
  • Player: Do you like cooking, Carlos?
    • The Chef: I love to cook. You get to work with a big pot and stir things in without being accused of witchcraft and cursing people!
  • Player: I have to go.
    • The Chef: Oh, I'll see you around port then. Farewell!
  • [View previous cutscenes]
    • replay voyages below

Random events[edit | edit source]

A Simple Favour[edit | edit source]

  • The Chef: Do you deal in spices? I could do with something with a bit more POW!

Last Orders[edit | edit source]

  • The Chef: Thanks for the offer, but my alcohol goes in the sauce for that extra kick.

Story voyages[edit | edit source]

Meet the Chef[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Meet the Chef.
  • The Chef: Thank you for rescuing me! I'd have gone mad if I was there another day.
  • Player: No problem, Mister...
  • The Chef: Oh! My name? Right... uh, Carlos. Carlos Napp.
  • Player: Welcome to port, Mr. Napp.
  • The Chef: Carlos will do fine! I'd be happy to thank you and your staff by cooking you a banquet.
  • Player: It would be good to sample your cooking. The crew said your dishes were unique.
  • The Chef: YES! Yes, exactly! That's why I went out there: to find new, unknown flavours and ingredients.
  • Player: Seems like you succeeded. I'll inform the crew of the banquet.
  • The Chef: You're having a banquet? I'll cook something up for it as a thank you!
  • Choose an Option.
    • Agree... again.
      • Player: Okay... sure. Sounds like a good idea.
      • The Chef: I won't take no for an answer!
    • Keep quiet.
      • The Chef: I won't take no for an answer!
  • Player: I hope he doesn't poison anyone.
  • Congratulations - you have unlocked the Chef adventurer, Carlos Napp! The Chef now has a chance to visit your port daily, bringing voyage opportunities.

Perfect Flavour[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Perfect Flavour.

Before voyage

  • Player: Hello, Carlos. How can I help you?
  • The Chef: Ah, yes. I'm running low on my more exotic ingredients. I'd like to join the crew of a ship heading east.
  • Player: What do you mean by 'exotic' ingredients?
  • The Chef: No need to be alarmed! There's nothing dangerous about the herbs I use. They come from an island surrounded by sharks and covered with toxic berries.
  • Player: That doesn't sound safe at all.
  • The Chef: Indeed! Why would you even go there?
  • Player: To find the exotic herb?
  • The Chef: What a coincidence! I'm looking for a herb from that very island! And I know a safe way to get there.
  • Confirm Carlos hasn't gone mad.
    • Player: Are you sure you know what you are doing?
    • The Chef: Probably. But I assure you, I'll not endanger your crew. I'll even get you supplies for the port. How's that sound?
    • Player: Okay, you can join the crew. But the captain's word is final on any decision.
  • Go along with the idea
    • Player: I'm going to regret this, aren't I?
    • The Chef: Probably. But I assure you, I'll not endanger your crew. I'll even get you supplies for the port. How's that sound?
    • Player: Okay, you can join the crew. But the captain's word is final on any decision.

After Voyage

  • The Chef: We did it! We stocked up the galleys with supplies!
  • Player: I thought you were getting supplies for the port.
  • The Chef: Yes, supplies that I can cook for you and your staff! You're welcome!
  • Player: I guess the crew works better with decent food in their bellies.
  • The Chef: That's the spirit! All I ask is that I may personally unload certain barrels from the galley.
  • Player: I don't suppose you'd like to tell me what's in the barrels.
  • The Chef: Don't worry, I'm not smuggling something suspicious! Now, I must take my leave of you: the barrels won't move themselves. At least, I don't think they will.
  • Player: I'd better arrange a search of those barrels.

Toxins[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Toxins.

Before Voyage

  • The Chef: You asked to see me?
  • Player: The crew reported odd symptoms. Some are seriously ill - particularly the crew from your last voyage.
  • The Chef: Ah, yes...that. The herbs can be ever-so-slightly toxic if not prepared correctly. The crew are snacking on them raw.
  • Player: Ever-so-slightly toxic? Some of the men are near death!
  • The Chef: Oh, fuff! They're only near-death, not actually dead. They'll get better.
  • Player: You'd better hope so. I want you to return the plants and put up warning signs. If we're lucky, no one else has been exposed to them.

After Voyage

  • The Chef: The plant... it's all gone.
  • Player: I know it is - I told you to get rid of it!
  • The Chef: No, no, no. Not the stuff in the barrels. The plants on the island.
  • Player: Is it possible that someone else found them?
  • The Chef: It's possible, though there's no sign that they were harvested. It's like they vanished.
  • Player: My crew will look out for sightings of the plant. If it gets into food, we could have a lot of sick people on our hands.
  • The Chef: A prudent decision.

Boiling Over[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Boiling Over.

Before Voyage

  • Player: Carlos, thank you for seeing me.
  • The Chef: I hope this is good news.
  • Player: It's not good news at all! My crew have heard of a village that made a miraculous discovery - a stash of harvested herbs.
  • The Chef: Ah, I see where this is going.
  • Player: Yes, indeed.
  • The Chef: Someone has found a plant that harvests itself!
  • Player: No, Carlos. They found the barrels that you returned to the island.
  • The Chef: Oh, yes. That makes more sense.
  • Player: You need to make sure that the villagers don't eat the plant. Is there anything that could act as an antidote?
  • The Chef: I'm not sure. I can try some recipes that settle fever and sickness. Those might help.
  • Player: Anything you can do. The ship is waiting. Please go now.

After Voyage

  • Player: Carlos, welcome back. Did you manage to help the villagers?
  • The Chef: We found the village, but no barrels. A party had taken them to another village, to trade for weapons.
  • Player: Did you find the party?
  • The Chef: We had to return for supplies. We looked for as long as we could.
  • Player: Let's hope they don't trade the barrels before we find them. If I get any more news, I'll let you know.
  • The Chef: I've given your crew the anti-fever recipe, just in case they find the party while I'm not there.
  • Player: Thank you.

To The Ship![edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:To The Ship!.

Before Voyage

  • The Chef: I heard the party's been spotted! Quick! To the ship!
  • Player: Agreed. I've already informed the crew. Try to find them if you can, but don't endanger the crew.
  • The Chef: Understood! To the ship!

After Voyage

  • Player: Did you locate them, Carlos?
  • The Chef: We did.
  • Player: Excellent!
  • The Chef: It wasn't all excellent.
  • Player: Why?
  • The Chef: They're all dead, save one. It was a gruesome sight. Either they killed each other, or something ambushed them and did some serious damage.
  • Player: What did the survivor say?
  • The Chef: Not much. Still in shock. She said some madness about the jungle coming at them, which apparently drove them into a frenzy. She wasn't making much sense.
  • Player: I'll get further information from the crew. It seems like the plant is no longer a threat, at least.
  • The Chef: Perhaps. The barrels of plants are still missing. Something fishy is going on.

Barrels of Mystery[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Barrels of Mystery.

Before Voyage

  • Player: You wanted to speak to me, Carlos?
  • The Chef: I want to go back to do some research.
  • Player: What are you hoping to discover?
  • The Chef: It's curious that the barrels of plants just disappeared. There must have five or six barrels, but no...poof! All gone!
  • Player: You're not a detective Carlos. Why are you even interested?
  • The Chef: I think there's a link between the plant and the creature that attacked the party.
  • Player: But the island's dangerous! What are you going to do? Fend the creature off with your wooden spoon? Are you insane?
  • The Chef: I survived the weeks with my trusty spoon. This doesn't sound like any creature I know about, and I want to study about it.
  • Player: You mean, you want to be the first to cook it.
  • The Chef: Er, no...
  • Player: Carlos...
  • The Chef: Oh okay, I want to cook it! People are finding new delicacies every day. There's word that someone's even cooked pig. Pig, I tell you! Who knows that this thing could taste like?
  • Player: Okay, Carlos. I'll arrange for a crew to drop you off en-route, but they'll not endanger themselves. Take care out there.

After Voyage

  • The Chef: Portmaster!
  • Player: Carlos, I see you made it back in one piece.
  • The Chef: Yes, yes. I have news. I was right about the sneaky plants! It was them all along!
  • Player: Slow down, explain yourself. What is this about the plants?
  • The Chef: There are no plants!
  • Player: Okay Carlos, I think you've been out in the sun too long.
  • The Chef: I'm telling the truth! The plants and the beast are one and the same!
  • Player: You're telling me that the plants turned into the creature?
  • The Chef: Yes! Or the creature can turn into a plant. Either way, it explains everything!
  • Player: Do you have evidence? Scholars will want to know about this.
  • The Chef: No, not as such. But I saw a plant change with my own eyes! It's just like the fellow from the party said - the jungle came alive.
  • Player: What are you going to do?
  • The Chef: Until I can kill the creature, I can't get close enough to eat it. My spoon-lasso-trap wasn't particularly effective.
  • Player: Are you giving up?
  • The Chef: No no! I'm going to cook up some tasty bait! Then we'll see if we learn more about it. We don't want a potentially tasty animal going extinct, do we?
  • Player: Will you need transport?
  • The Chef: I have already arranged travel. Thank you for your help. I'll return if more information comes to light.

Joint Voyages[edit | edit source]

Reinforcement[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Reinforcement.

Before Voyage

  • Player: I've gathered you together to discuss a problem that Lidylla is having.
  • The Architect: It is the small matter of a creature attacking miners from my hometown. I have been informed that you have both encountered this animal.
  • The Trapper: Say no more, young lady! It's the shape-shifting blighters! Just let me just load up Ol' Bessie and-
  • The Chef: Hold up, you can't just go exploding them, Reginald! There'll be nothing left to cook!
  • Player: There will be no exploding or cooking. Both of you are going to accompany Lidylla, so that you can keep the miners safe.
  • Trapper & Chef: Yes, Portmaster.

After Voyage

  • Player: How is the mining site?
  • The architect: There have been fewer attacks, thanks to these two. They were most competent.
  • The trapper: I'll take that as a compliment, fair maiden.
  • Player: Did you learn anything more about the creature?
  • The chef: A miner managed to injure one of the creatures quite badly.
  • The trapper: Poor creature seemed to dissolve. Discombobulated into a bluish-purplish goop!
  • Player: So, that's their true form?
  • The architect: It seems so. Whatever they are, they are unhappy with our presence. But we need to mine the material, so we have no choice.

Once More Into the Breach[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Once More Into the Breach.

Before Voyage

  • Player: There's been news from the mining site.
  • The Architect: Further attacks?
  • Player: Not quite. The creatures only attack when mining is being done. Once mining stops, there are no attacks.
  • The Trapper: Most enlightening. Perhaps the miners are encroaching on the creatures' territory. The little scallywags sound like they're defending something.
  • Player: Regardless, mining needs to continue, which means your help is needed. We have a boat waiting for you all.
  • The Chef: Is there time to load up on a few snacks?
  • Player: We are already fully stocked, Carlos. Cook on the way if you can. The miners deserve some good food in their bellies.
  • (Dialogue ends.)

After Voyage

  • Player: Any news from the site?
  • The Architect: Yes! We managed to get hold of the...what do you call it, Reginald?
  • The Trapper: Goop.
  • The Architect: We managed to get hold of the 'goop': the substance the creatures dissolve into when they die. The others seem very protective of the stuff.
  • Player: Curious.
  • The Chef: I think they're smarter than we give them credit for.
  • The Trapper: Undoubtedly. We also found out what they're protecting. They eat the mineral that we're mining.
  • Player: They eat rocks?
  • The Architect: More like 'absorb' them. They are feeding on the same property that resists vibration.
  • Player: So, to save your town from earthquakes, you have to starve an entire species.
  • The Architect: It leaves a bad taste in the mouth, but I can see no other option.
  • (Dialogue ends.)

Recipe Number 132:Fresh Idea[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:Recipe Number 132:Fresh Idea.

Before Voyage

  • The Chef: I've got an idea, and it's a good'un! It's not crazy or anything!
  • Player: Last time we followed one of your ideas, we almost poisoned a village.
  • The Chef: This plan has virtually no poisoning! My plan, you see, is to negotiate with the creatures...
  • The Trapper: Give it time, Portmaster. It's not as crazy as it sounds.
  • The Architect: Let me explain. The creatures can only access minerals from the surface. We can mine further down, and find more of it. Once we have the mineral, we offer them half of it.
  • Player: You're putting a lot of faith in the intelligence of these creatures.
  • The Trapper: It's the best we have.
  • The Chef: It has to work! I bet my best rolling pin on it.
  • The Architect: It will slow the mining down, but it is worth trying. Sharing has to be better than wiping out a species.
  • Player: Agreed. Good luck, all of you.

After Voyage

  • Player: How did it go?
  • The Chef: It worked! Doo-da-doo-da-doo! The creatures stopped their attacks and seem happy with the arrangement. Weeeeee!
  • The Architect: It seems that the mineral is tastier the further you mine down. The creatures are in bliss!
  • Player: What do you plan to do now?
  • The Chef: I'm going to travel; see if I can find the perfect flavour. I have a feeling it might be butterscotch.
  • The Trapper: I'm considering a holiday. If it happens to involve large beasts and high-powered weaponry, then I'm happy as
  • Player: I know a Larry from the zoo. He doesn't seem that happy. I hope your travels fare better than his.
  • The Architect: I can go back to my studies. I have heard of materials of structural interest. Some even come from other worlds.
  • Player: Well, I wish you all well in your endeavours.

Clue voyages[edit | edit source]

So Sous Me[edit | edit source]

The following text is transcluded from Transcript:So Sous Me.

(If successful:)

  • The Chef has received lessons from Gu Grandmaster Sozume. You can now access The Chef's hidden voyage: The Golden Ration!

Celebration of Fire[edit | edit source]

Before eating the strange lobster[edit | edit source]

  • The Chef: Greetings adventurer! Carlos. Carlos Napp - that's my name - cooking's my game! Haha!
  • Player: What are you doing here?
  • The Chef: I've recently been exploring the Eastern lands - very easterny, I have to say...
  • Player: Right...
  • The Chef: Rumours had it of a fantastically large lobster around these parts. I naturally rushed to see what the fuss was about.
  • Player: Oh, you mean Clawdia?
  • The Chef: Yes, Clawdia was it's name! A friend of mine called Shuma came along. He's a great whaler! Wait, no... his name's Hubbub.. he's hunting something called Shuma. A whale. Wait, is that right? Come on Carlos, keep it together!
  • Player: What did Hubbub find here?
  • The Chef: You know Hubbub? No way - me too! He just left after helping me find a claw of a giant lobster called Clawdia! I cooked it up right away. Care to try a piece?
  • Player: Sure, I'll try anything once.
  • The Chef: There you go, enjoy!

After eating the strange lobster[edit | edit source]

  • The Chef: Greetings adventurer! Carlos. Carlos Napp - that's my name - cooking's my game! Haha!
  • The Chef: How was the lobster?
  • Player: It was erm... delicious.
  • The Chef: Well, I think it needed more heat!