Transcript of The Bronze Age

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My dearest Kili,

I got fed up with the garbage metal they had me working with down here. I mean, even the smallest faction up top are using steel. This Bandos fellow still has these goblins using bronze, of all things! Bronze! Seems like he relies more on large numbers, and sure, bronze is cheaper for mass production, but it's like he doesn't care if these goblins live or die.

Some of the tunnels the goblins have been digging down here yielded the most potent peat I have ever seen. It'd be better used making a fine single malt, but maybe that can be a little side project, 'cause I need most of it to fire up Bertha.

So, bronze it is, but by Saradomin's beard it'll be the best damned bronze anyone has ever crafted! It'll be as strong as the earth we're all living inside in this awful place. Sure, I worry about how it'll be used, but, well, I'll keep that thought in my head for now...