Transcript of Once Upon a Slime

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This transcript involves dialogue with Peter, King Slime, Queen Slime, Eva, Thessalia, Hetty, and the player.

Beginning[edit | edit source]

  • If some trigger about not having met Peter
    • Player: Hey there!
    • Peter: 'Bout ye. The name's Peter!
    • Player: What's going on around here?
    • (Continues below)
  • If some trigger about having met Peter before
    • Player: Hey Peter!
    • (Continues below)
  • Peter: I didn't do it!
  • Player: Woah there... What are you talking about?
  • Peter: Oh, haven't ye heard? Thon King Slime fella is knockin' around again.
  • Are You Aware Of The Previous King Slime Event?
    • Yeah, I know all about it
      • Player: Didn't we send him away through a magical portal?
      • Peter: Aye, you fellas telemeportaled him good so ye did.
      • (Continues below)
    • Could you remind me?
      • Player:King Slime?
      • Peter:Aye, big blobby boyo he is. Was causin' some mischief here a while back. Lotta people popped him into one of them there magic portal thingies.
      • (Continues below)
  • Peter:But as it turns out, he didn't get too far. He was just stewin' down there in some poor soul's basement. Now he's back out and makin' a right mess of the place.
  • Player: That doesn't sound good.
  • Peter: Don't you be worryin' yer wee head. Peter's got a plan, gonna get this situation under control. Though, wouldn't mind a hand though if yer offerin'.
  • Do you want to help Peter?
    • Aye, I mean, yes.
      • The Quest interface appears
  • No thank you.
    • Player: I'll pass for now. Don't wanna get slime all over my clothes.
    • Peter: Suit yerself, Peter's got this.
    • (Dialogue ends)

Accepting the Quest[edit | edit source]

After accepting the quest

  • Player: Sure, I'll help you out!
  • Peter: Happy days!
  • Player: So where is the King Slime right now?
  • Peter: He can't be too far...
  • Player: What's happening!?
  • Camera shakes, fades out, and King Slime appears
  • Peter: Speak of the devil!
  • Player: He's bigger than I expected...
  • Peter: Yep... So, are ye ready to hear my grand idea to get rid of 'im?
  • Player: I guess so?
  • Peter: Alright, picture this... Queen Slime.
  • Player: ... What?
  • The player goes into an instance
  • Peter: Think about it fer a minute. What's the only thing that can tame a big blobby boyo? A giant gloppy gerl[sic]! They'll fall in love and the two of 'em will live happily ever after. Awk, it'll be so romantic so it will.
  • Player: ... I'm really sorry Peter, but that may be the stupidest idea I've ever heard.
  • Peter: Oh...
  • Player: Sorry Peter, I didn't mean to offend you. I just think we really should weigh up our options.
  • Queen Slime slowly slides across the screen
  • Player: We can look at what worked and didn't work last time. The portal was a fair success, we should probably start investigating there! ... Peter, why are you looking at me like that?...
  • Peter: Awk, I was fairly sure ye would love the idea.
  • Player: ...
  • The player notices the Queen Slime
  • Player: What have you done?!
  • The instance ends
  • Peter: Well, I guess we're going with my plan then!
  • Player: ... Gods give me strength. Fine. What am I doing?
  • Peter: That's the spirit! We need to introduce them, but he could do with a wee bit of a sprucin' up. We gotta get him all gorgeous for his wee date.
  • Player: How do you make a giant slime monster gorgeous?
  • Peter: Awk, I dunno, get him a wee hat or something. Aye! That'd do it! Pop a top hat on his wee head up there and before ye know it the two of 'em will be saunterin' off into the sunset.
  • Player: A top hat... right... Where can I find a top hat we can use?
  • Peter: I'd go have a chat with Thessalia over in the clothes shop in Varrock. She's a wee dote, sorted me out with this chef costume so she did.
  • Player: Alright, I'll go pay her a visit. ...[sic] Did he say chef... costume?
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Peter Again[edit | edit source]

  • If the player hasn't accepted the quest yet
  • Peter: Changed yer mind about takin' down this blobby boyo?
  • If players haven't collected the top hat
    • Peter: Did ye get it?
    • Player: No, not yet.
    • Peter: For dear sake, head on over to Thessalia in Varrock and get a top hat for our boy here.
    • Peter: Yer standin' in the way of true love here.
    • Player: Sorry.
    • Player: I'll be back with the hat.
    • (Dialogue ends)

Top hat[edit | edit source]

Thessalia[edit | edit source]

Initially

  • Select An Option
    • Talk about Once Upon a Slime
      • Thessalia: Hi there, how can I help you?
      • Player: Uh, this is going to be a tough one to explain.
      • Thessalia: I'm listening.
      • Player: Have you by any chance heard of the King Slime?
      • Thessalia: How could I not have? I still have nightmares of the chaos he caused in Rimmington. As I lie in bed at night sometimes I can still hear the GLOOP GLOOP GLOOP...
      • Player: I'm sorry.
      • Thessalia: It's okay. It was just such a tough time for Gielinor. I'm just glad that it's all behind us.
      • Player: Uh... I'm afraid I have some good news and some bad news...
      • Thessalia: What's the good news?
      • Player: The King Slime fiasco is definitely behind us.
      • Thessalia: And the bad news?
      • Player: It's also in front of us.
      • Thessalia: No... You can't mean..?
      • Player: I'm afraid so.
      • Thessalia: *Sigh* Tell me everything.
      • Player: Well, it's pretty much the same situation as last time, except now there's two of them.
      • Thessalia: Two... slimes?
      • Player: Yep, a king and a queen.
      • Thessalia: ...[sic] I swear, has that imbicile been messing around with his jelly again?
      • Player: Yeah, a little bit.
      • Thessalia: *sigh* Okay, what do you need from me?
      • Player: This may sound strange, but Peter has asked me to get a top hat for the king. He has this crazy plan to make the queen fall in love with the king in the hope that they'll cease their violent ways and live happily ever after.
      • Thessalia: I guess that could work?
      • Player: Yeah... I'm not sure, but it's worth a shot. But anyway, I don't suppose you happen to deal in ridiculously large top hats?
      • Thessalia: Well, actually, it's funny you should say that. You'd have to have been living under a rock to not have heard of my world record attempt.
      • Player: Uh...
      • Thessalia: I'm well known around here for being the creator of the second largest top hat in Gielinor. OF ALL TIME.
      • Player: Right... That's actually oddly convenient. Can I borrow it by any chance?
      • Thessalia: Go for it, anything to save Gielinor.
      • Player: Thank you! I hope this works...
      • Thessalia: Good luck!
      • Thessalia hands you a very, very large top hat.
      • Player receives Giant top hat.
      • (Dialogue ends)
    • Talk about something else.
      • Non quest dialogue

Talking to Thessalia again about Once Upon a Slime

  • If you lost the top hat
    • Player: I'm so sorry, I lost your famous top hat.
    • Thessalia: Not to worry, I have plenty of spares.
    • Player: Oh! Thank you!
    • Thessalia hands you another very, very large top hat
  • Select an Option
    • Talk about Peter
      • Thessalia: Hey again, you should really take that top hat back to Peter and see what he thinks.
      • Player: Alright, I'll do that.
      • (Dialogue ends)
    • Talk about the biggest top hat
      • Player: Hey Thessalia, you said you created the second largest top hat. Who's the mastermind behind the largest?
      • Thessalia: ...[sic] Why does that matter?
      • Player: I'm just curious, that's all.
      • Thessalia: It was that guy over in the fancy dress shop.
      • Player: The one nearby?
      • Thessalia: Shhhh... He might be listening.
      • Player: Hm...
      • Thessalia: YES! THAT'S RIGHT! I AM GIVING UP ON THE LARGE TOP HAT GAME, THERE WOULD BE NO NEED FOR ANYONE TO CREATE ANY MORE LARGE TOP HATS.
      • Player: Huh?
      • Thessalia winks at you.
      • Thessalia: Oh, I'll get him next year.
      • Player: I'm sure you will.
      • (Dialogue ends)

Returning to Peter[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Hey Peter, I got the giant top hat you asked for!
  • Peter: 'scuse me. Did you say you got our slime boyo a giant top hat?
  • Player: I did yeah!
  • Peter: Fer dear sake, what part of get him a wee top hat did ye not get? He's gonna look a buck eejit in that thing.
  • Player: ... Peter, sometimes you say words and I don't know what they mean.
  • Peter: He's gonna look daft so he is! Right, you listen here now. You take that right back to Thessalia and I want you to give her a right tonguin'.
  • Player: Peter!
  • Peter: Would you wise the bap, it means a tellin' off.
  • Player: Oh right.
  • Peter: That thing's ridiculous, what kind of size of top hat is that supposed to be.
  • Player: Okay, I'll take it back and see if she has a smaller one.
  • Peter: Ye better!
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to him again with the large top hat

  • Peter: That you sorted?
  • Player: No, not yet.
  • Peter: Well ye better get on over to Thessalia right now. That bloomin' hat was desperate.
  • Player: I'll be back with a smaller hat.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to King Slime

  • Player: Gloop Gloop!
  • Gloop Gloop Gloop Gloop Gloop!!!
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Queen Sime

  • Player: Gloop!
  • Gloop Gloop Gloop Gloop!
  • (Dialogue ends)

Poking Queen Slime

  • Why would you want to poke Queen Slime? You'll get your hand all sticky.

Returning the giant top hat[edit | edit source]

Talking to Thessalia about Once Upon a Slime

  • Thessalia: Did the plan work? Please tell me it worked.
  • Player: Well...
  • Thessalia: Well?
  • Player: Peter sent me back because the top hat is too big.
  • Thessalia: Too big? How can it be too big!? It's for a massive Slime King!
  • Player: I know... I don't really get it either.
  • Thessalia: What does he want me to do about it anyway?
  • Player: Well, he actually just wants you to give me a smaller top hat. One which is... regularly sized.
  • Thessalia: But I specialise in giant top hats! Peter knows this!
  • Player: I take it this means you don't have any smaller top hats?
  • Thessalia: No. I do not.
  • Player: Damn. Okay, well, thanks anyway. I'll go and tell Peter the bad news.
  • Thessalia: Sorry... Wait. EVA.
  • Player: ...?
  • Thessalia: I have an idea. Eva has been building a shrinking machine.
  • Player: A shrinking machine?
  • Thessalia: Yes. Maybe you could use it to shrink the top hat I gave you to a normal size?
  • Player: That might just work... Where can I find her?
  • Thessalia: She was setting up her machine in East Varrock. I believe it's in one of the buildings just south of the bank.
  • Player: Great, that's not too far from here.
  • Thessalia: Just be careful. And don't blame me if something goes wrong.
  • Player: What do you mean?
  • Thessalia: Oh, nothing. I'm sure everything will be fine.
  • Player: Hmmm...
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Thessalia again about Once Upon a Slime

  • Talk about Eva
    • Player: Where can I find Eva again?
    • Thessalia: Ah yes, she's in East Varrock, try the building just south of the bank.
    • Player: Thank you!
  • Talk about the biggest top hat.
    • (Same as above)

Shrinking the top hat[edit | edit source]

Trying to use the Shrinking Machine before talking to Eva

  • Player: I should probably ask permission from Eva before using her machine.

Talking to Eva

  • Eva: Hey there. It's not normal for me to get visitors!
  • Player: Hi, Thessalia sent me, says you might be able to give me a hand.
  • Eva: Oh! Thessalia! She's a great companion of mine. A friend of Thessalia is a friend of mine indeed!
  • Player: That's great!
  • Eva: So, spit it out. What am I doing for you?
  • Player: Well, you see, I've got this giant top hat.
  • Eva: That is indeed a very large top hat, probably the second largest I've ever seen! Is it for me?
  • Player: No, it's actually for a slime king.
  • Eva: Oh, that's disappointing.
  • Player: Uh, yeah... Unfortunately, it's way too big.
  • Eva: Too big you say?
  • Player: Yep!
  • Eva: Oh! Oh! This is perfect! You could shrink it using my machine!
  • Player: I was hoping you'd suggest that.
  • Eva: Oh, this is fantastic! You can be the first one to test it!
  • Player: First one to test it? Is this safe?
  • Eva: I am 100% certain that it is probably very safe. Maybe.
  • Player: Uh oh... So, how do I use this machine?
  • Eva: It's simple! Just configure the control panel and you're good to go.
  • Player: How do I configure the control panel?
  • Eva: Pull some levers, push some buttons, it's not too complicated, you'll figure it out! If you do it wrong it'll tell you how many of the inputs you got correct. Or it will explode. I think it'll tell you about the inputs though.
  • Player: Okay... I hope so...
  • Eva: Yeah, just keep fiddling with it and eventually you'll get what you want!
  • Player: Thanks, I'll give it a go.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Eva again

  • Eva: Hi I'm Eva, how can I help you?
  • Player: Eva, we've met before.
  • Eva: Have we?
  • Eva: Oh yes! You're Thessalia's companion.
  • Player: That's me...
  • Player: How do I use this machine again?
  • Eva: It's simple! Just configure the control panel and you're good to go.
  • Player: How do I configure the control panel?
  • Eva: Pull some levers, push some buttons, it's not too complicated, you'll figure it out! If you do it wrong it'll tell you how many of the inputs you got correct. Or it will explode. I think it'll tell you about the inputs though.
  • Player: Okay... I hope so...
  • Eva: Yeah, just keep fiddling with it and eventually you'll get what you want!
  • Player: Thanks, I'll give it a go.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Configuring the shrinking machine[edit | edit source]

  • You open the control panel of Eva's shrinking machine.
  • You choose a series of options to questions to tune the machine. Each one proceed to the next question, no matter what option is selected
  • Button Panel One
    • Silver Button
    • Golden Button
  • Temperature Gauge
    • Cold
    • Medium
    • Hot
  • Button Panel Two
    • Red Button
    • Green Button
  • Mode Of Functionality
    • Decrease
    • Increase
    • Reduce
  • Apply Voltage
    • Yes
    • No
  • Adjust Control Lever
    • KSL
    • QSL
    • PET
  • If the player chose incorrectly
  • You have correctly configured x out of 6 of the machine's settings.
    • If the player choose incorrectly 3 times
      • Eva: Is that machine of mine causing you some trouble?
      • Select An Option
        • Yes it is.
          • Player: Yes it is.
          • Eva: Hmm.... I'm sure the correct configuration had at least something to do with the machine's intended functionality...
          • Player: Okay, I'll keep trying.
          • (Dialogue ends)
        • No, everything is fine.
          • Eva: Excellent! I'm sure you'll figure it out friend.
          • (Dialogue ends)
  • If the Player configured the machine correctly
    • You successfully configure Eva's shrinking machine. You place the very, very large top hat into the machine.
    • Player places the top hat in the machine and it smokes
    • Eva's machine smokes, and then spits out a much smaller top hat.
    • {{{1}}}
    • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Eva again[edit | edit source]

  • If you lost the top hat
    • Player: I've lost the hat that we shrunk down.
    • Eva: Well, I've got some goods news. Just after you left, my machine spat out another top hat.
    • Player: Is it supposed to do that?
    • Eva: I don't know. Probably... Yes!
    • Player: Okay...
    • Eva hands you a replica of the top hat you previously created.
  • Eva: Did it work?
  • Player: It sure did.
  • Eva: Splendid! Now that we know it works, how would you feel about shrinking yourself down so you can ride around in my pocket?
  • Player: Uh... I'll pass...
  • Eva: Awww, let me know if you change your mind.
  • Player: I better get this hat back to Peter.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Returning the regular top hat[edit | edit source]

Using the top hat on the King Slime

  • Maybe I should let Peter do that...

Using the top hat on the Queen Slime

  • We're sprucing up the king, not the queen.

Talking to Peter

  • Player: I've got the... wee... top hat here.
  • Peter: Would ye look at that, that's class.
  • You give the top hat to Peter.
  • Peter: Let's get it to our boy and let them get down to courtin'. C'mere handsome!
  • Camera fades out
  • Peter affixes the top hat to King Slime.
  • The king slowly makes its way over to the queen.
  • Camera pans to King and Queen Slime next to each other.
  • Peter: That's it big lad! I think it's workin!
  • Player: Is it?
  • The queen slides away
  • Peter: No!
  • Long pause
  • Peter: Awk, son...
  • Cutscene ends
  • Peter: Awk, his poor wee heart's broke. I was sure that was gonna work.
  • Player: It's almost as if this was a stupid idea to begin with...
  • Peter: 'Scuse me, I've had enough of your negativity. Clearly, there's nothin' wrong with the plan. There's just something else around here that's takin' her fancy.
  • Player: *sigh*
  • Peter: Sure, go have a wee chat with her, maybe she'll tell ye what's got her so distracted.
  • Player: Do you seriously want me to go and have a conversation with the giant slime monster?
  • Peter: Aye, I'm deadly serious.
  • Player: Why does this not surprise me...?
  • Peter: Look, you just dander over there, give her a friendly poke and say... 'Here love, what's the matter with ye?' She'll open her wee heart to ye and let ye know what the craic[sic] is.
  • Player: This is never going to work!
  • Peter: Awk, don't knock it 'til ye try it. Off ye go now!
  • Player: *sigh*
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Peter before poking the Queen Slime

  • Peter: Have ye figured out what's distractin' her yet?
  • Player: Not yet, what am I doing again?
  • Peter: Go on and sweet talk Queen Slime to find out what's distractin' her.
  • Peter: Just a wee poke and some kind words ye know?
  • Player: ...
  • Player: Yep, that's what I thought you said.
  • Player: I'll be back.

Poking Queen Slime:

  • Player: I can't believe I'm doing this... What did he want me to say again? Uh...
  • Player pokes Queen Slime
  • Player: Hello love what is wrong with you?
  • A piece of goop sticks to you as you move your arm away.
  • Player receives Pink gloop.

Poking Queen Slime again

  • Player: I can't believe I'm doing this... What did he want me to say again? Uh...
  • Player pokes Queen Slime
  • Player: Hello love what is wrong with you?
  • You poke the Queen Slime... However this time your hand comes back goopless.

Talking to Peter again

  • Peter: Well, what'd she say?
  • Player: Nothing useful! I don't speak slime monster! I just ended up with this chunk of slime.
  • Peter: Oh!
  • Player: Oh?
  • Peter: Maybe we can use that.
  • Player: How?
  • Peter: Well, that's just a piece of the queen herself right? Surely if she's bein' drawn to something, then it'd make sense if a piece of her slime would be too.
  • Player: Hmmm... Actually, you may be onto something here.
  • Peter: Aye, ye see, not just a pretty face. Use the chunk of slime around the place and see if it's being drawn anywhere in particular. Also...
  • If the Player has not gotten a bucket from Peter yet
    • Here, ye can have my favourite bucket so you can. Never know when ye might need it.
  • Peter hands you a bucket. This could be really useful.
  • Player receives Bucket.
  • Player: Alright I'll see what I can do!
  • (Dialogue ends)
  • If the Player already received the bucket:
    • Peter: Thon bucket I gave ye might be of use.
    • Player: Alright I'll see what I can do!
  • (Dialogue ends)

Gloop[edit | edit source]

Holding the Pink goop[edit | edit source]

In the wrong place

  • You hold the pink goop. It appears to be drawn to something, it must be somewhere in Rimmington.

Next to Hetty's Cauldron

  • You hold the pink goop. It appears to be drawn to something right next to you!

Talking to Hetty[edit | edit source]

  • Select An Option
    • Talk about Once Upon a Slime
      • Hetty:What is that slimy monstrosity, and why is it so interested in my cauldron?
      • Player:Oh it's just Queen Slime.
      • Hetty:Peter...
      • (Dialogue ends)
    • Talk about something else.
      • Non Quest dialogue

Purple goop[edit | edit source]

Using the bucket on Hetty's Cauldron

  • You fill your bucket with the strange purple goop.
  • Player receives Bucket of purple goop.

Talking to Peter with the Bucket of purple goop

  • Player: I found something goopy in the cauldron that she seems to like!
  • Peter: Ye did?
  • Player: Yeah... were you not expecting me to?
  • Peter: Uhhh, ye, I was! I knew somethin' around here was distractin' the big gerl.
  • Player: Right... So, what are we going to do with this purple goop?
  • Peter: Hmmm... Alright, what if we just splashed it over our boyo? Ye know, like one of them colognes. He'll be smellin' right and fancy. She'll be wild keen on him after that I'd bet.
  • Player: Alright, I'll go do that now!
  • (Dialogue ends)

Using the bucket of purple goop on King Slime}}

  • You splash the goop over King Slime.
  • Once again, the king makes its way over to the queen...
  • Camera pans to King and Queen Slime, then to Peter and the Player
  • Peter: Oh this is lookin' promisin'[sic] Go on my son!
  • Player: She definitely seems more interested this time!
  • Peter: Aye! And why wouldn't she be? Just look at 'im! Our fella's looking wild dapper and got the smell to back it up!
  • Player: I guess... Wait. What is she doing?
  • Gloopy sounds are heard
  • Peter: Yes!
  • Peter: Go on ye gerl ye!
  • Player: ...
  • Peter: ...
  • Player: Oh Gods!
  • Player performs Panic emote
  • Peter: Uh oh...
  • Peter performs Panic emote
  • Player: ... Peter, what have you done?
  • Player performs Cry emote, and Peter performs Shrug emote
  • The camera shows the Queen Slime next to just the top hat, looking both pink and green.
  • Peter: ... Well we did it!
  • Player: What do you mean we did it!? She absorbed him! I think you've created something far worse than any form of slime royalty that came before.
  • Peter: Awk! Would you lighten up! The King Slime is no more and look, Queen Slime's headed off on her holidays! And you know what, if I were a bettin' man, I'd say we'll never see nor hear from her again.
  • Player: *grumble*
  • Peter: And look, she was so happy she's left us a pressie! There's a swanky new top hat for me. And you can hold onto that bit of pink slime!
  • Player: ...
  • Peter: Don't worry about it, you've earned it.
  • Camera fades out, and Peter is now wearing the top hat
  • Peter: Oh would ye look at that, this is a fine wee hat so it is. Are you enjoyin' yer wee bit of slime?
  • Player: ... Oh! It's alive!
  • The slime gurgles at you.
  • Peter: Awk, well aren't you a wee dote! I think she likes you!
  • Player: I guess she is kind of adorable...
  • Peter: And there was you, sittin' complainin' and all that. All's well that ends well.
  • Player: Yeah, seems like it's not all bad.
  • The slime gurgles some more.
  • Peter: Now that's all over... How's about we hit the town and find me a lassie?
  • Player: Uh, I think I'll leave that to you Peter.
  • Peter: Ye sure? Suit yourself!
  • Player: Good luck Peter!
  • Peter: Who needs luck when you've got a fancy hat like this?
  • Peter tips his new hat to you.
  • Congratulations! Quest complete!
  • (Quest completion interface opens.)
  • Congratulations! You have completed: 'Once Upon a Slime'.

Post-quest[edit | edit source]

Eva[edit | edit source]

  • Player: Hey Eva.
  • Eva: Oh, hello! It's marvellous to see you again.
  • Player: It's great to see you too. Do you happen to have another copy of the top hat your machine produced?
  • Eva: Why, did you lose yours?
  • Player: Not exactly... I'd just like one for myself.
  • Eva: Well, I've got some good news. Just after you left, my machine spat out another top hat.
  • Player: Is it supposed to do that?
  • Eva: I don't know. Probably... Yes!
  • Player: Okay...
  • Eva hands you a replica of the top hat you previously created. You add it to your wardrobe.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Talking to Eva again after claiming the hat

  • Player: Hello.
  • Eva looks lost in thought and doesn't notice you.
  • (Dialogue ends)

Attempting to shrink something else again

  • Player: I'm not sure I like my chances a second time around...

Peter[edit | edit source]

  • Peter: Ye sure I can't interest you on a wee night on the town?
  • Player: Nah, I'll leave it to you Peter.
  • Peter: Your loss!