Dialogue for Morytania guard

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This transcript involves dialogue with Morytania Guard (human) and Morytania guard (werewolf).

Paterdomus Mauseoleum[edit | edit source]

(The following conversations play on repeat in a timed rotation:)

Conversation 1[edit | edit source]

  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Oh I meant to ask, what did Sally think of the cake?
  • Morytania Guard (human): Oh! She loved it mate.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Not too sweet? I haven't quite got the hang of baking with chocolate yet.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Not at all. She thought it was delicious.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Oh good. I'm really starting to get into baking.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): I really need to learn how to get the flour out of my fur.
  • Morytania Guard (human): You could always ask a friend for help.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): No! I know where this is going.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): This is not an excuse for you to give me dating advice.
  • Morytania Guard (human): What? All I'm saying is that you could have whatshisface over...
  • Morytania Guard (human): You know, the 'wolf with lustrous brown fur'.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Nope. Stop. I know we have a peace treaty right now...
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): But if you keep trying to set me up with Ed...
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): I will kill you.
  • Morytania Guard (human): What can I say? Just want my buddy to be happy is all.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Grrrrrr

Conversation 2[edit | edit source]

  • Morytania Guard (human): How's things in Morytania these days anyway Greg?
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Depends who you're asking really.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): If you're a vyre or a human, life's pretty good.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): The triumvirate are bringing the two races together.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Sure there's tithes, but it's much less than before.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Vyres gotta eat and all that. But it's voluntary now I think.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): They even pay humans who donate now.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Sounds like a definite improvement.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Yeah, well, as always no one really thinks about the werewolves.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): We're still living in near poverty and being used as guard dogs.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): I mean don't get me wrong Alex, I like working here.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): It's good hours and good company.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Aww thanks mate.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): But it always feels like everyone just forgets that werewolves are people, ya know?
  • Morytania Guard (human): Well, if it helps, I think werewolves are pretty cool.
  • Morytania Guard (human): I mean, you scared the hell out of me when I first saw you.
  • Morytania Guard (human): But now I can see past the enormous claws, I can see you have an enormous heart.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): That's the cheesiest thing I've heard in a while Alex.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): But thanks.

Conversation 3[edit | edit source]

  • Morytania Guard (human): So I hear Vanescula and Efaritay are at each other's throats?
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Ha. Quite the opposite from what I hear.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Though you didn't hear that from me.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): The two of them seem to be agreeing on a lot more recently.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): It's making Morytania much friendlier.
  • Morytania Guard (human): I bet some of the vyres dont[sic] like that.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Some of the traditionalists don't like it.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): But with vyre numbers falling as human conversions drop...
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): None of them are willing to kick up a fuss yet.

Conversation 4[edit | edit source]

  • Morytania Guard (human): So I have to ask, what do the vyres think of bacon?
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): What's that?
  • Morytania Guard (human): I thought the pig trade was in full swing now?
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Oh. Well yeah, but they're not being used for bacon.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): From what I hear, pigs' blood is pretty similar to human blood.
  • Morytania Guard (human): No bacon? You are missing out. I'll bring some next shift for you.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Sounds good. I have to say I'm so glad we're trading again.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): The first time in centuries and we're getting other goods from kingdoms.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): I'm just hoping Misthalin fashions start getting to the rest of us.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Dyes other than red, proper cottons and threads.
  • Morytania Guard (human): The splitbark your side are sending through are quite something.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Comparatively cheap and with anti magic properties
  • Morytania Guard (human): I hear the Wizards' Tower are really excited to see what other uses it has.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Beyond armour I mean.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Eh. Never bother with the stuff myself.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Can never understand wearing bark.
  • Morytania guard (werewolf): Probably wearing some other wolf's latrine.
  • Morytania Guard (human): Well that's a horrible image.