Transcript of Goblin Diplomacy

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This transcript involves dialogue with Grubfoot, General Wartface, General Bentnoze, and the player.

Starting out[edit | edit source]

Talking to the Goblin Generals[edit | edit source]

First time[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • General Bentnoze and General Wartface may randomly greet you with any one of the following: 
      • Dialogue 1: 
        • General Wartface: Green armour best.
        • General Bentnoze: No, no, red every time.
        • General Wartface: Go away, human, we busy.
          • (Continues below)
      • Dialogue 2: 
        • General Bentnoze: Red armour best.
        • General Wartface: No, it has to be green!
        • General Bentnoze: Go away, human, we busy.​
          • (Continues below)
      • Dialogue 3: 
        • General Wartface: We should wear green armour!
        • General Bentnoze: Green armour? Are you stupid?
        • General Wartface: You stupid! Only stupid goblins think red armour better!
        • General Bentnoze: No they don't! Me think red armour better!
        • General Wartface: That because you stupid!
        • General Bentnoze: Me not stupid!
        • General Wartface: Then why you not like green armour?
        • General Bentnoze: Because red armour better!
        • General Wartface: Only stupid goblins think that! You stupid!
          • (Continues below)
      • Dialogue 4: 
        • ​General Bentnoze: All goblins should wear red armour!
        • General Wartface: Not red! Red armour make you look fat.
        • General Bentnoze: Everything make YOU look fat!
        • General Wartface: Shut up!
        • General Bentnoze: Fatty!
        • General Wartface: SHUT UP!
        • General Bentnoze: Even this human think you look fat! Don't you, human?
        • Player: Um...
          • Yes, Wartface looks fat[sic]
            • Player: Yes, Wartface looks fat!
            • General Bentnoze: Ha ha! See, fatty? Even human think you fat!
            • General Wartface: Me not care what human think! Human ugly!
              • (Continues below)
          • No, he doesn't look fat[sic]
            • Player: No, he doesn't look fat.
            • General Bentnoze: Shut up, human! Wartface fat and human stupid!
            • General Wartface: Shut up, Bentnoze!
              • (Continues below)
      • Dialogue 5: 
        • General Wartface: I tell all globlins in village to wear green armour now!
        • General Bentnoze: They not listen to you! I already tell them wear red armour!
        • General Wartface: They listen to me not you! They know me bigger general!
        • General Bentnoze: Me bigger general! They listen to me!
        • General Wartface: Human! What colour armour they wearing out there?
        • Player: Half of them are wearing red and half of them green.
        • General Wartface: Shut up, human! They wearing green armour really! Human lying because [he/she] scared of you!
        • General Bentnoze: Human scared of me not you! Then you think me bigger general!
        • General Wartface: What? Me mean...
        • General Wartface: Shut up! Me bigger general!
          • (Continues below)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • General Bentnoze: We decide to celebrate goblin new century by changing colour of our armour, brown get boring after a bit. We want change.
      • General Wartface: Problem is they want different change to us.
        • (Shows other options)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • General Wartface: Yeah peace is good as long as it peace wearing green armour.
      • General Bentnoze: But green too much like skin. Nearly make you look naked!
        • (Shows other options)
    • Do you want me to pick an armour colour for you?
      • General Wartface: Yea as long as you pick green
      • General Bentnoze: No you have to pick red!
        • You should wear red
          • General Bentnoze: See? Even stupid human think red best. Now we all wear red!
          • General Wartface: Human not know anything! If we wear red then whole village be ugly like YOU!
          • General Bentnoze: Go away human. You not helping.
        • You should wear green
          • General Wartface: Green! We all wear green now, human has decided!
          • General Bentnoze: Why we have to do what human say? He not boss of us!
          • General Wartface: No but he agree with me!
          • General Bentnoze: That prove you a filthy human-lover!
          • General Wartface: Me hate humans! This human just happen to be right!
          • General Bentnoze: Go away human. You not know anything.
        • What about a different colour?
          • Player: What about a different colour? Not green or red?
          • General Bentnoze: That would mean me wrong ... but at least Wartface not right!
          • General Wartface: Me dunno what that look like. Have to see armour before we decide.
          • General Bentnoze: Human! Bring us armour in new colour!
          • General Wartface: What colour we try?
          • General Bentnoze: Orange armour might be good.
          • General Wartface: Yep bring us orange armour.

Talking to Goblins[edit | edit source]

If Goblin is not sparring [edit | edit source]

While wearing green armour[edit | edit source]
  • Goblin: Green armour best.
    • Err ok.
      • Player: Err ok.
    • Why is green best?
      • Player: Why is green best?
      • Goblin: I forgot now, but General Wartface says it is. So it must be.
While wearing red armour[edit | edit source]
  • Goblin: Red armour best.
    • Err ok.
      • Player: Err ok.
    • Why is green best?
      • Player: Why is green best?
      • Goblin: I forgot now, but General Bentnoz e says it is. So it must be.

If Goblin is sparring or about to spar[edit | edit source]

While wearing green armour[edit | edit source]
  • Goblin [#1]: Green armour best.[sic]
  • Goblin [#2]: Red armour best!
While wearing red armour[edit | edit source]
  • Goblin [#1]: Red armour best!
  • Goblin [#2]: Green armour best!

Greldo[edit | edit source]

  • Greldo: Green armour betht!
    • Why is green best?
      • Greldo: Green ith colour of cabbageth.
        • I think you mean 'cabbage'. It's a non-count noun.
          • Greldo: Grammar nart-thee...
            • (Shows previous options)
        • What's so special about cabbage?
          • Greldo: Cabbageth tayth-tee. Me like cabbageth.
          • Player: Cabbage. Singular.
            • (Shows previous options)
        • Cabbage? Yuck!
          • Greldo: That what you think, thilly human.
            • (Shows previous options)
        • I love cabbage!
          • Greldo: You eat Draynor cabbageth?
          • Player: Cabbage.
          • Greldo: It tayth-tee. It tingleth on my lipth.
            • (Shows previous options)
        • Enough about cabbage...
          • Greldo: Hmph.
            • (Shows initial options)
    • You're not even wearing any goblin mail!
      • Greldo: Human not have to rub it in.
        • (Shows initial options)
    • That's quite a 'lithp' you've got there.
      • Greldo: Me not have lithp. What'th a lithp?
        • You appear to suffer from a speech impediment.
          • Greldo: Me thuffer from thpeech-
          • Player: Please, stop right there, before you shower me in spittle.
          • Greldo: Thower you in thpitt-
          • Player: Enough. Please, stop talking.
            • (Shows previous options)
        • You 'theem' to 'thtruggle' with your 'ethith'.
          • Greldo: That big lithp you got there, human!
            • (Shows previous options)
        • There's no easy way to say this...
          • Player: You have a lisp.
          • Greldo: A lithp?
          • Player: No. Try again. Lisp.
          • Greldo: Lithp?
          • Player: Close enough.
            • (Shows previous options)
        • Enough about your lisp.
          • Greldo: What lithp?
            • (Shows initial options')
    • I'll be going now...
      • Greldo: Yeth. You go, human.

Grubfoot[edit | edit source]

  • Grubfoot: Grubfoot wear red armour! Grubfoot wear green armour!
  • Grubfoot: Why they not make up minds?
  • General Bentnoze: Shut up Grubfoot!

Fighting Goblins[edit | edit source]

While fighting amongst themselves Goblins may say any of the following at random:

  • Goblin: Green!
  • Goblin: Green armour best!
  • Goblin: Green armour stupid!
  • Goblin: Green not red!
  • Goblin: Red armour best!
  • Goblin: Red armour stupid!
  • Goblin: Red not green!
  • Goblin: Red red red!
  • Goblin: Stupid greenie!
  • Goblin: Stupid reddie!

Searching a crate with goblin armour[edit | edit source]

First time[edit | edit source]

  • You find some goblin armour.

Afterward[edit | edit source]

  • You search the crate but find nothing.

Agent Orange[edit | edit source]

After being asked to bring orange armour[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • Where am I meant to get orange armour?
      • Player: Where am I meant to get orange armour?
      • General Bentnoze: Well first you get goblin armour...
      • General Wartface: ...and then you dye it orange!
      • General Bentnoze: Even human should be able to work that out!
        • But where do I get goblin armour?
          • Player: But where do I get goblin armour?
          • General Wartface: There some spare armour around village somewhere. You can take that.
          • General Bentnoze: It in crates somewhere. Can't remember which crates now.
        • But where do I get dye?
          • Player: But where do I get dye?
          • General Bentnoze: You go north of here into Wilderness. There you find many ways to die!
          • Player: No, D-Y-E, not D-I-E.
          • General Wartface: Stupid Bentnoze, you not know how to spell!
          • General Bentnoze: Shut up, Wartface!
          • Player: Do you know where I can get dye though?
          • General Bentnoze: Me not know where dye come from.
          • Player: Well where did you get your red and green dye from?
          • General Wartface: Some goblin or other, he steal it. Say he steal it from old witch in Draynor Village.
          • General Bentnoze: Maybe you can get more dye from her?

Giving the Goblin Generals orange goblin mail[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • I have some orange armour here.
      • Player: I have some orange armour here.
      • Camera pans to changing room.
      • General Wartface: Grubfoot!
      • Grubfoot: Yes General Wartface sir?
      • General Wartface: Put on this armour!
      • Grubfoot goes into the changing room...[sic] ...And[sic] emerges wearing orange armour.
      • Grubfoot: What do you think?
      • General Wartface: No I don't like that much.
      • General Bentnoze: It clashes with skin colour.
      • General Wartface: We need darker colour, like blue.
      • General Bentnoze: Yeah blue might be good.
      • General Wartface: Human! Get us blue armour!
      • Camera returns to normal view.

Talking to Grubfoot with orange goblin mail[edit | edit source]

  • Grubfoot: Me not like this orange armour. Make me look like that thing.
  • Player: Look like what thing?
  • Grubfoot: That fruit thing. The one that orange. What it called?
  • Player: An orange?
  • Grubfoot: That right. This armour make me look same colour as orange-fruit.
  • Dialogue 1:
    • General Wartface: Shut up Grubfoot!
  • Dialogue 2:
    • General Bentnoze: Shut up Grubfoot!

Agent Blue[edit | edit source]

After being asked to get blue armour[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • How am I meant to get blue armour?
      • Player: How am I meant to get blue armour?
      • General Bentnoze: Maybe same way you got orange armour?
      • General Wartface: Get goblin armour and dye it blue!
        • But where do I get goblin armour?
          • (Same as above)
        • But where do I get dye?
          • (Same as above)

Giving the Goblin Generals blue goblin mail[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • I have some blue armour here.
      • Player: I have some blue armour here.
      • Camera pans to changing room.
      • General Wartface: Grubfoot!
      • Grubfoot: Yes General Wartface sir?
      • General Wartface: Put on this armour!
      • Grubfoot goes into the changing room...[sic] ...And[sic] emerges wearing blue armour.
      • Grubfoot: What do you think?
      • General Bentnoze: That not right. Not goblin colour at all.
      • General Wartface: Goblins wear dark earthy colours like brown.
      • General Bentnoze: Yeah brown might be good.
      • General Wartface: Human! Get us brown armour!
      • Player: I thought that was the armour you were changing from. Never mind, anything is worth a try.
      • Camera returns to normal view.

Talking to Grubfoot with blue goblin mail[edit | edit source]

  • Grubfoot: Me not like this blue colour.
  • Player: Why not?
  • Grubfoot: Me not know. It just make me feel...
  • Player: Makes you feel blue?
  • Grubfoot: Makes me feel kind of sad.
  • Dialogue 1:
    • General Wartface: Shut up Grubfoot!
  • Dialogue 2:
    • General Bentnoze: Shut up Grubfoot!

Agent Brown[edit | edit source]

After being asked to get brown armour[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • How[sic] am I meant to get brown armour?
      • Player: Where[sic] am I meant to get brown armour?
      • General Wartface: Brown was old colour of armour before we change it.
      • General Bentnoze: There bound to be some around somewhere.

Giving the Goblin Generals goblin mail[edit | edit source]

  • Greeting: 
    • (Same as above)
  • After greeting: 
    • Why are you arguing about the colour of your armour?
      • (Same as above)
    • Wouldn't you prefer peace?
      • (Same as above)
    • ​I have some brown armour here.
      • Player: I have some brown armour here.
      • Camera pans to changing room.
      • General Wartface: Grubfoot!
      • Grubfoot: Yes General Wartface sir?
      • General Wartface: Put on this armour!
      • Grubfoot goes into the changing room...[sic] ...And[sic] emerges wearing brown armour.
      • Grubfoot: What do you think?
      • General Wartface: That colour quite nice. Me can see myself wearing that.
      • General Bentnoze: It a deal then. Brown armour it is.
      • General Wartface: Thank you for sorting out our argument. Take this gold bar as reward!
      • Camera returns to normal view.
Congratulations! Quest Complete!