Dialogue for Cook (Lumbridge)

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Cook's Assistant[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: What am I to do? (after declining the quest: Hey, it's you! Have you come back to help me?)
  • What's wrong? (after declining the quest: Help you with what?)
    • Cook: Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, I'm in a terrible, terrible mess! It's the Duke's birthday today, and I should be making him a lovely, big birthday cake using special ingredients…
    • Cook: …but I've forgotten to get the ingredients. I'll never get them in time now. He'll sack me! Whatever will I do? I have four children and a goat to look after. Would you help me? Please?
    • -Player has to accept or decline the quest Cook's Assistant-
    • Not right now
      • Cook: Fine. I always knew you adventure types were callous beasts. Go on your merry way!
    • Accept Quest
      • Cook: Oh, thank you, thank you. I must tell you that this is no ordinary cake, though - only the best ingredients will do! I need a super large egg, top-quality milk and some extra fine flour.
      • Player: Where can I find those, then?
      • Cook: That's the problem, I don't exactly know. I usually my assistant to get them for me but he quit.
      • Cook: I've marked some places on your world map in red. You might want to consider investigating them.
  • Can you make me a cake?
    • Cook: *sniff* Don't talk to me about cakes…
    • -leads to the "What's wrong?" dialogue starting with "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear"-
  • You don't look very happy.
    • Cook: No, I'm not. The world is caving in around me. I'm overcome with dark feelings of impending doom.
    • What's wrong?
      • -leads to the "What's wrong?" dialogue starting with "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear"-
    • I'd take the rest of the day off, if I were you.
      • Cook: No, that's the worst thing I could do. I'd get in terrible trouble.
      • Player: Well, maybe you need to take a holiday…
      • Cook: That would be nice, but the Duke doesn't allow holidays for core staff.
      • Player: Hmm, why not run away to the sea and start a new life as a pirate?
      • Cook: My wife gets seasick and I have an irrational fear of eyepatches. I don't see it working.
      • Player: I'm afraid I've run out of ideas.
      • Cook: I know, I'm doomed.
      • -leads to the "What's wrong?" dialogue starting with "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear"-
  • Nice hat!
    • Cook: Er, thank you. It's a pretty ordinary cook's hat, really.
    • Player: Still, it suits you. The trousers are pretty special too.
    • Cook: It's all standard-issue cook's uniform.
    • Player: The whole hat, apron and stripy trousers ensemble…it works. It makes you looks like a real cook.
    • Cook: I AM a real cook! I haven't got time to be chatting about culinary fashion, I'm in desperate need of help!
    • -leads to the "What's wrong?" dialogue starting with "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear"-
  • What happened to the castle?
    • Cook: The castle really did suffer in the battle of Lumbridge. I'm glad it's over!
    • Cook: People came from all over the world to help rebuild, and now things are getting back to normal. I'm glad - I have important things to cook and I'm not letting anything get in the way!
    • Cook: In fact, even now I'm preparing a cake for the Duke's birthday! Although… umm…
    • What's the problem?
      • -leads to the "What's wrong?" dialogue starting with "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear"-
    • I'll get you on with it!
      • -Dialogue ends-

After accepting Cook's Assistant[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: How are you getting on with finding the ingredients?
  • You give the [item] to the cook. (only if have item delivering)
  • Player: Here's some top-quality milk/the extra fine flour/a super large egg. (if item will be delivered, it will say with one of them based on the item)
  • Player: I haven't got any of them yet, I'm still looking. (if don't have)
  • Cook: Please get the ingredients quickly. I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me out onto the street! (if don't have any ingredients) (if have at least one ingredient delivered: Thanks for the ingredients you have got so far; please get the rest quickly. I'm running out of time! The Duke will throw me out onto the street!)
  • You still need to get: [items] (if not all items delivered yet)
    • I'll get right on it.
      • -Dialogue ends-
    • Where can I find the ingredients?
      • Cook: That's the problem, I don't exactly know. I usually my assistant to get them for me but he quit.
      • Cook: I've marked some places on your world map in red. You might want to consider investigating them.

Cook's Assistant, after bringing everything[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: You've brought me everything I need! I am saved! Thank you!
  • Player: So, do I get to go to the Duke's party?
  • Cook: I'm afraid not. Only the big cheeses get to dine with the Duke.
  • Player: Well, maybe one day, I'll be important enough to sit at the Duke's table.
  • Cook: Maybe, but I won't be holding my breath.
  • -Cook's Assistant quest complete-

After completing Cook's Assistant[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: Hello, friend, how is the adventuring going?
  • I'm getting strong and mighty.
    • Player: I'm getting strong and mighty. Grr.
    • Cook: Glad to hear it.
  • I keep on dying.
    • Player: I keep on dying.
    • Cook: Ah, well, at least you keep coming back to life too!
  • Can I use your range?
    • Player: Can I use your range?
    • Cook: Go ahead! It's a very good range; it's better than most other ranges.
    • Cook: It's called the Cook-o-Matic 25 and it uses a combination of state-of-the-art temperature regulation and magic.
    • Player: Will it mean my food will burn less often?
    • Cook: As long as the food is fairly easy to cook in the first place!
    • Cook: Here, take this manual. It should tell you everything you need to know about this range.
    • The cook hands you a manual. (only if you don't have one in your inventory already)
    • Player: Thanks!
  • What happened to the castle?
    • Cook: The castle really did suffer in the battle of Lumbridge. I'm glad it's over!
    • Cook: People came from all over the world to help rebuild, and now things are getting back to normal. I'm glad - I have important things to cook and I'm not letting anything get in the way!

Dialogue[edit | edit source]

  • Do you have any other quests for me?
    • Player: Do you have any other quests for me?
    • Player: That last one of yours was fun!
    • Cook: Ooh dear, yes I do!
    • Cook: It's the Duke of Lumbridge's birthday today, and I need to bake him a cake!
    • Cook: I need you to bring me some eggs, some flour, some milk and a chocolate bar...
    • Cook: Nah, not really, I'm just messing with you! Thanks for all your help, I know I can count on you again in the future!
  • I am getting strong and mighty.
    • Player: I'm getting strong and mighty. Grr.
    • Cook: Glad to hear it.
  • I keep on dying.
    • Player: I keep on dying.
    • Cook: Ah, well, at least you keep coming back to life too!
  • Can I use your range?
    • Player: Can I use your range?
    • Cook: Go ahead! It's a very good range; it's better than most other ranges.
    • Cook: It's called the Cook-o-Matic 25 and it uses a combination of state-of-the-art temperature regulation and magic.
    • Player: Will it mean my food will burn less often?
    • Cook: As long as the food is fairly easy to cook in the first place!
    • Cook: Here, take this manual. It should tell you everything you need to know about this range.
The cook hands you a manual.
    • Player: Thanks!
  • Can you tell me anything about that chest in the basement?
    • Player: So that chest in the basement that suddenly appeared along with the Culinaromancer...
    • Player: Can you tell me anything about it?
    • Cook: You mean you didn't check it out yet?
    • Cook: I really think you should, it seems to be some kind of magical cooking chest, I found a bunch of food in it earlier, along with a bunch of weird looking kitchen equipment and some snazzy gloves!
  • What happened to the castle?
    • Player: What happened to the castle?
    • Cook: The castle really did suffer in the battle of Lumbridge. I'm glad it's over!
    • Cook: However, I have important things to cook and I'm not letting that get in the way!
    • Cook: In fact, even now I'm preparing a great feast. Although... umm...

After accepting Recipe for Disaster[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: Great! You're back!
  • Cook: Did you bring the ingredients I asked for?
  • Cook: Remember, I need an eye of newt, a glass of greenman's ale, a rotten tomato, and a 'Dirty Blast'!
    • If the player has none of the items:
      • Player: Sorry, I don't have any of that with me...
      • Cook: Well come back when you have all of them! And hurry! It is a VERY important meeting!
      • (Same as below)
    • If the player has some of the items:
      • Player: I have some of that stuff with me, but not all of it...
      • Player: I'm afraid I only have an eye of newt with me...
      • Cook: Come back and see me when you've got everything I need!
      • (Same as below)
      • Select An Option
        • Okay then.
          • Player: Okay then. I'll get on it.
        • Where do I get an eye of newt?
          • Player: Where would I find an eye of newt?
          • Cook: I don't know. A newt's face?
          • Player: Thank you so much for that help.
          • Cook: Ah, I don't know where they get them, they usually have them at herblore and magic shops.
        • Where do I get a rotten tomato?
          • Player: Where would I find a rotten tomato?
          • Cook: I'm not entirely sure, but I hear they're sold for public spectacles.
          • Player: Public spectacles?
          • Cook: Yeah. Pre-arranged combats, caught thieves on show, that sort of thing.
        • Where do I get a greenman's ale?
          • Player: Where would I find a greenman's ale?
          • Cook: Well, as the official sponsored drink of Castle Wars it might be worth looking around there.
        • Where do I get a 'Dirty Blast'?
          • Player: Where would I find a 'Dirty Blast'? I've never heard of it before.
          • Cook: Yes, I must admit I had never heard of it either until reading through my ancestor's cookbook.
          • Cook: Tell me, do you know how to make a Fruit Blast?
            • Select An Option
              • YES
                • Player: A Fruit Blast? Sure, like they sell at Blurberry's Bar, right?
                • Cook: Ah, so you've heard of it then? But for this recipe I'd need a fresh one; you can't just buy me one from a shop or from your friends.
                • Cook: Well, a 'Dirty Blast' is a freshly made Fruit Blast, but then for some reason you add ash at the end!
                • Player: Freshly made? Why did you specify that?
                • Cook: Apparently the ash reacts with the freshly squeezed juice in the glass. It means you can't just buy one Blurberry made earlier, you'll have to make it yourself.
                • Player: Well, it shouldn't take that long.
                • Cook: That's the spirit!
              • NO
                • Player: A Fruit Blast? Can't say I've ever heard of it...
                • Cook: Ah, well, they're a popular Gnomic delicacy served at the Blurberry bar. But for this recipe I'd need a fresh one; you can't just buy me one from a shop or from your friends.
                • Cook: Basically, what you do is juice a pineapple, an orange and a lemon, then put them all into a cocktail shaker.
                • Cook: Pour that into a glass, then top with a slice of lemon.
                • Player: Okaaaay... So what's a 'Dirty Blast'?
                • Cook: Well, apparently after you have done the above then by adding ashes you create a unique new drink.
                • Player: Sounds horrible..
                • Cook: I agree, but it's what the recipe specifically needs.
                • Cook: Bear in mind it will only work with very fresh ingredients, so you will have to make your own cocktail, not rely on one of the pre made ones Blurberry sells.

Special dialogue[edit | edit source]

  • Cook: I know you've been very active around Lumbridge and Draynor. Perhaps I could reward you with some food?[1]
  • Yes, please.
    • Cook: There you go.
    • Cook: Seriously, you were great! I can't believe I nearly caused all of those people to be killed!
    • Cook: You really got my bacon out of the fire there!
  • No, thanks.
    • Cook: Seriously, you were great! I can't believe I nearly caused all of those people to be killed!
    • Cook: You really got my bacon out of the fire there!

Notes[edit | edit source]

  1. ^ This dialogue takes place after completing the Lumbridge and Draynor Tasks.