Transcript of Cold War journal entry

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  • I have agreed to help Larry build a bird hide on an iceberg to the north.
  • I should take the road from Catherby going north. I follow it until I reach the Sinclair Mansion-I take a left at the Mansion, cross two bridges and follow the road until I reach Rellekka. Then I head east, around Rellekka, to the coast near the entrance of Keldagrim.
  • I built the bird hide structure. It wasn't easy to do in all this snow.
  • Larry and I spied on the penguins from the bird hide. It wasn't as exciting as I expected, but Larry seemed to think otherwise.
  • Larry had this crackpot idea about making a penguin suit and infiltrating their ranks. Apparently, he used to work at the Ardougne Zoo. For some reason he thinks the penguins got him fired.
  • I made a penguin suit using my crafting table at my house. I used a wood plank, a piece of silk and a clockwork mechanism.
  • We tried out the suit at the Zoo. Being shrunk down and walking around as a penguin was easier than I expected. The penguins at the Zoo wouldn't talk to me without a greeting.
  • The greeting was what we observed the penguins on the iceberg doing. I had to twirl, then wave and flap.
  • He asked if I'd learned how to fly How very strange! I decided to improvise.
  • I told him about getting shot out of a cannon. I hope I never have to do that again.
  • I explained how I'd flown in a hot air balloon. That will sure confuse them.
  • I said that I flapped really hard and jumped. He seemed to buy it.
  • He noted it down in his mission report and then gave it to me. He told me to go and see the penguins in Lumbridge. Larry said he'd meet me there.
  • I went to Lumbridge and found the penguin operatives disguised as sheep in Fred the Farmer's field! I performed the greeting correctly for these new penguins.
  • They didn't seem impressed.
  • These Lumbridge penguins wouldn't talk to me with out[sic] a secret phrase. I wonder if the penguin at the Ardougne Zoo knows the phrase?
  • I managed to 'convince' the penguin to tell me the secret phrase. It was: Do not trust the walrus.
  • I went back to Lumbridge to tell the penguins the secret phrase. They talked to me, but reluctantly.
  • The penguins wanted me to investigate Fred the Farmer. I talked to Fred, but he wasn't too impressed when I explained that there were penguins in his field.
  • I told the penguins about Fred the Farmer, but I wanted to spice it up a little. I said that Fred the Farmer was the King of Lumbridge. They thought I was being serious!
  • Then they gave me their mission report.
  • I managed to get the Lumbridge penguins to tell me where this 'outpost' is It's the iceberg we visited originally! They said the password to get in was 'cabbage' Larry and I returned to the iceberg, I gave the correct greeting to the guard at the door.
  • Then I gave him the password. I thought I was on my way in but the guard told me I couldn't get in without ID. Why penguins need ID eludes me.
  • Larry suggested finding a shifty penguin who could get me a fake ID. I spoke to a penguin named Noodle.
  • Noodle wanted swamp tar and chicken feathers in exchange for an ID and a mission report.
  • I used the 10 on the guard and he let me into the iceberg. I needed to be debriefed before I could go any further.
  • I met a KGP agent in the debriefing room. I gave him all the mission reports.
  • But, even after all that, I still had to complete a physical! It was an agility course, but I had to do it in my penguin suit. I saw a regiment doing drills. They look quite dangerous.
  • I rushed to tell Larry about the army. He said it sounded like they were preparing for war... with us.
  • Larry said we needed to find out what the penguins were planning. I found some doors that are well guarded. I think what I need is through there.
  • I spoke to Ping and Pong - the 'berg bards - about the doors, but they didn't know much. They just wanted to sing me a song.
  • I wanted to hear Ping and Pong's song but they didn't have any instruments, so I had to steal a cowbell from a cow and make a set of bongos.
  • I saw what the penguins were working on. It was a Giant Penguin Monster! I went for a closer look, but got caught.
  • They took my suit and are going to use the design to finish their Giant Penguin.
  • He said I was to be thrown to the Ice Lords.
  • I was thrown into a pit deep in the iceberg where they locked away the Ice Lords. I killed an Ice Lord and managed to escape! It was a close call.
  • Larry met me out by the bird hide. I told him what happened in the War Room
QUEST COMPLETE