Darren Lightfinger

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(Guildmaster) Darren Lightfinger is the founder and leader of the Illustrious Thieves' Guild, located in the cellar of the house where the Zamorakian herbalists live. After founding the guild, he sent out flyers advertising for potential guild members, promising fame, fortune and the admiration of the opposite sex.[1]

He is rather charismatic and dramatic, prone to giving big and speeches to inspire his followers.[2] Despite his grandeur, the Guild itself has been in operation a mere fortnight,[3] attracting a total of three members, including himself.[4] He describes himself as a scofflaw, thief and brigand,[5] proudly boasting of his rebellion against what he claims are oppressive forces.[6] However, he was unable to convince Ozan, a fellow master thief, to join, which he considers a missed opportunity.[7]

Despite being a master thief, he rarely personally gets involved in capers on behalf of the Guild, preferring to send out recruits to obtain sources of income while he deals in intelligence and contacts. He justifies this as both he and his second-in-command Chief Thief Robin are well known.[8] However, his intelligence can sometimes be dated or incorrect.[9] As more capers are completed, the guild expands and he upgrades his clothing. Among the services he procures for the expanded guild include extra training methods, a shop and access to the banking system. The cost of setting up these new premise and facilities is draining though, which became a problem when the time came to officially register as a guild.[10]

Once the Guild has been fully expanded, it is possible to undertake the basic pickpocketing lesson again. If the recruit's Thieving level is high enough, they can steal the hanky without Darren noticing, leading to them teaching Darren some tricks using Darren's own words.

Works[edit | edit source]

Transcripts Darren Lightfinger is the author or co-author of:

Update history[edit | edit source]

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Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The quote "It's the eye of the kyatt, it's the will of the heist... Again!" is a reference to the 'Survivor' song, 'Eye of the Tiger'.
  • The quote "Handkerchief on, handkerchief off" is a reference to the 1960 play "Oliver", based around the Charles Dicken's novel Oliver Twist. This connection is further reinforced with his next line "Oom-Pah-Pah - whoops that's not until the second act!" (Oom-Pah-Pah is another song from the play).
  • The quote "Handkerchief on, handkerchief off" may also be a reference to "Karate Kid" in which one of the training exercises consists of him waxing cars with the instruction "Wax on, wax off!".

References[edit | edit source]

  1. ^ Dodgy flyer, written by Darren Lightfinger, page 1, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Commissions, fame and the adulation of your peers and of the opposite sex will be your fate as a successful applicant."
  2. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "If you join me I can offer you every opportunity for reward and for fame, or at least infamy. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to your destiny. Welcome to the preliminary course, you fine members-in-waiting of the underworld gentry!"
  3. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Two weeks." When asked "How long has this guild been in operation?"
  4. ^ Player character, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Is this it? The 'world-renowned' guild is a cellar with two blokes and a straw dummy lurking in it?"
  5. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Some will say that I am a scofflaw, a thief, a brigand... These people are correct!"
  6. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "But if I scoff at the law, it is because the law as we know it is a tool that 'The Man' is using purely to keep us in our place. If I thieve, it is from those who have more than they deserve and more than they need. And if I am a brigand, it is only by the standards of those whom I, er, brig."
  7. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "If only I could have convinced Ozan to sign on with us. Such a pity… A master thief like him would have been perfect for my plans."
  8. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Oh, Robin and I are both too well known; anyone with valuables would be instantly on their guard."
  9. ^ Player character, "Buyers and Cellars", RuneScape. "Well, the chalice wasn't where you said it was, nor was the owner; I just wanted to make sure you had something right in all of this."
  10. ^ Darren Lightfinger, "A Guild of Our Own", RuneScape. "[The Guild Registry's] fees are exorbitant, I'm afraid, and we've spent all our capital on building."

Dialogue[edit | edit source]